


Red River

by Duthea



Category: Pocket Monsters | Pokemon (Main Video Game Series), Pocket Monsters: Red & Green & Blue & Yellow | Pokemon Red Green Blue Yellow Versions
Genre: Comedy, Gen, I have no idea how to tag this fic, Light Swearing, Pokemon Death, Retelling, Script Format, Some dark comedy, Video Game Mechanics, don't worry about that 'pokemon death' tag too much, illustrated fanfic, like how do i tag pokemon ocs that evolve over the course of the story, watch me write a dialogue-focused fic with a quiet protagonist lol
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-15
Updated: 2020-09-14
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:29:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 18,759
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25938184
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Duthea/pseuds/Duthea
Summary: A comedic, light-hearted retelling of the story of the first-gen Pokemon games. Follow the tall, quiet and placid Red and his neighbor, the short, loud and hot-tempered Green, as well as their Pokemon on their journey!
Kudos: 1





	1. Pallet Town - Slightly Less Than Idyllic

**Author's Note:**

> This is a story written only for myself, but I'd be happy if somebody else likes these goofy kids and Pokemon and their adventures. Also, I started writing it like ten years ago, so if this feels really 00s that'd be why!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red and Green receive their first Pokemon.

The place: Pallet Town, Kanto. It's a beautiful day. Pidgeys are peeping loudly over Prof. Oak's Laboratory.   
A shoe gets thrown at them from the window. It hits the ground, and a Rattata immediately rushes over  
to see if it's edible. The chokes of a rodent can be heard as the view shifts to inside the Laboratory.  
We see the Professor himself setting three Pokeballs on the table. He turns around to face us, as if he  
heard the narration.

Oak  
Hello there! Welcome to the World of Pokemon! My name is Oak! People call me the Pokemon Prof! ...Well,  
more often they call me "That Goddamn Freeloader, Oak," but that's beside the point!

The Professor picks up one of the Pokeballs, and lets the Pokemon inside it out.

Pikachu  
(Huh? What's going on?)

Oak  
This world is inhabited by creatures called POKEMON! For some people, POKEMON are pets. Others use them   
for fights. Myself... I study POKEMON as a profession.

Oak calls the Pikachu back.

Pikachu  
(...No, really, what? And why did you say "Pokemon" like that?)

Oak  
First, what is your name?

A short boy stomps onto the scene.

Boy  
Gramps, what are you going on about? Are you talking to thin air? Why are you doing that? Why do you only  
have one shoe? Gramps!

Oak  
That's right, this is my grandson, Green.

Green  
Gramps! Stop talking to the air! Pay attention to meee! You promised I get a Pokemon today!

Oak  
Green? Oh, that's right, I told you to come! But, there's another boy who's supposed to get his  
first Pokemon today... Erm, what was his name again?

Green  
Are you stupid, gramps? It's Red, obviously!

Oak  
Right! So his name was Red!

Green  
Yeah! So do I get my Pokemon now? Come on!

Oak  
Patience, Green. You have to wait for Red to arrive.

Green  
That'll take forever! I bet he's still sleeping! I'm gonna to go get him!

Green storms out of the door.

Oak  
That boy... he's way too impatient. Go see how he's doing, would you?

We certainly will. The view shifts to outside a house. Through the window, we can see a boy's  
bedroom. A black-haired boy who's too tall for his age is sleeping soundly. Suddenly, a small stone  
hits the window. Two more follow, as we hear a familiar voice shouting.

Green  
Heeey, Reeeeddd!! Are you awake yeeeett?! Stupid Red, you gotta wake up! REEEDDD!!

The boy stirs, and sleepily gets up and walks to open the window. A stone hits him in the forehead.

Green  
Finally! What takes you so long to wake up? Stupid Red, you gotta come to Gramps' lab! We're gonna  
get Pokemon, come on! Get dressed and come out quickly! Come on come ooonnnn!

Red groggily closes the window. We then move a bit forward in time to see him fully clothed, walking  
downstairs.

Red's mother  
Good morning, Red! Green was just here. You're going to get a Pokemon from Professor Oak?

Red nods.

Red's mother  
Right. All boys leave home some day. It said so on TV.

Red looks at her questioningly.

Red's mother  
Oh, it was in a commercial... Look, there it is again!

TV's salesman  
All boys leave home some day... So before that, why not spoil them a little? Buy the new Super  
Nintendo!

Red shakes his head and looks at his mother questioningly again.

Red's mother  
Oh, that wasn't it? Then, you were asking... Why do I think you're leaving home?

Red nods.

Red's mother  
Well, I just thought... Since you're getting a Pokemon, I assumed you were going on a Pokemon  
Journey! You're about that age, aren't you?

Red shrugs.

Red's mother  
I think going on a journey would be good for you. You'd get to see the world, learn a little indepency,  
maybe even open up a little. And who knows, maybe you'd be good at it! Oh, but I'm talking too much;  
go see Green now, he must be impatient!

Red nods, and waves at his mother as he leaves. We move to the Laboratory with him.

Green  
RED! You are so slow! Why are you so slow?

Oak  
All right, you're both here! Now, see those three Pokeballs on that table? Those contain the Pokemon  
you can choose from. There's the grass-type Oddish, the water-type Poliwag and the electric-type  
Pikachu. You can both pick one.

Green  
What? Graaamps, Daisy told me the Pokemon are Bulbasaur, Charmander and Squirtle! Why aren't they?

Oak  
Ah, yes, that's right. Often, the Pokemon are those. Daisy happened to pick her Pokemon at a time like  
that. Right now, though, they aren't.

Green  
So you were lazy and didn't get those?

Oak  
Quiet, you! Ahem... No. I usually get them from Bill, but right now he's angry with me for some reason.  
But these are just as fine!

Green  
Okay, whatever. I want Poliwag.

Oak  
Red, do you have anything against that?

Red picks up Pikachu's Pokeball.

Oak  
So, you want Pikachu?

Red nods.

Green  
Ha! My Pokemon is way more awesome than yours! Come out, Poliwag!

Poliwag  
(...)

Oak  
Do you want to nickname your Pokemon?

Green  
Yeah! I'll name it, ummm. Minamo! It's like japanese and stuff, it's way better than any nickname you  
can give to your Pokemon, Red!

Red calls his Pikachu out.

Pikachu  
(Yes? Did you need something?)

Red  
...Pika.

Oak  
Hm? Is that what you want to nickname your Pikachu?

Red nods.

Green  
HA! That nickname sucks, Minamo is waaay better! Hey do you want to fight, Red? Do you? Do you,  
huh? Come on, let's fight! Go Minamo!

Oak  
I, I'm not sure if my laboratory is the best place to battle...

Red  
...Pika.

Pika walks forward to face Minamo.

Green  
Minamo, let's totally win this! Come on, use... Bubble!

Red  
Thundershock.

Pika does as told. It's Super Effective. Minamo fainted!

Green  
. . . No way! Minamo! Ugh, you cheateeedd! You so cheated, stupid Red! You... you, you poopiehead!  
You're so stupid and dumb! Minamo, return! Red, you're sooo stupid, I'm going to tell Daisy not  
to give yo a map, so ha! Stupid stupid stupid cheater! Ugggh!

Green storms out of the door, still ranting. Then, he pokes his head back in through the doorframe.

Green  
And you smell too!

And then he leaves.

Oak  
...Well! I suppose I could've spent some more time thinking about the balance between those Pokemon.  
So, Red, what are you going to do now?

Red picks up Pika and places him on his head.

Pika  
(...Okay then.)

Oak  
That... doesn't really answer my question. Green was planning on going on a journey, what about you?

Red shrugs.

Oak  
Huh. Actually, If you don't have anything else to do, could you do me a favor and go to the Viridian   
City Pokemart? My order just arrived there. Just ask for Oak's Parcel. You may have to use words.  
Can you do that?

Red nods.

Oak  
Good! Thank you, Red.

Red then waves at Oak and leaves. We follow him to show he's gone... home.

Red's mother  
Oh, Red, you're back! What a cute Pokemon! What's it called?

Red  
Pika.

Red's mother  
Hi there, Pika!

Pika  
(Hello!)

Red's mother  
Awww. Oh, Red? Are you leaving?

Red  
Mm. Viridian.

Red's mother  
So you're starting the journey... I... I'm proud of you, Red.

Red  
...? 

Red takes a moment to try and think of how to say what he's thinking.

Red  
...Helping Oak.

Red's mother  
Oh? Is it about that Pokedex he's been talking about?

Red shakes his head.

Pika  
(Whaa! I'm on your head here! Don't forget about me!)

Red's mother  
No? Then I have no idea what it is.

Red  
...Pokemart.

Red's mother  
Ahh, I see, you're getting something he ordered for him! That's great! Well, go on then, don't  
let me keep you here too long!

Red nods, waves at his mother and leaves.

And this ends our first chapter. We zoom up to show a scenic view of Pallet Town, a town with  
three houses and not much more. Pidgeys are chirping, and a Gastly can be seen bouncing in the air  
right above a single shoe on the ground. This is Pallet Town. Shades of your journey await!

_Image description: Picture of Red holding Pika in his arms and Green holding Minamo above his head._


	2. Route 1 - Not Much to Write About

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red and Pika travel through Route 1.

Chapter 2: Route 1 - Not Much to Write About

The place: Route 1, Kanto. It's a beautiful day. The wild Rattatas of Route 1 are having a field  
day eating the carcass of a Spearow that got lost too far away from it's home and ran into the wrong  
flock of Pidgeys. A tall young boy with a Pikachu on his hat walks past, causing the Rattatas to   
scurry away hurriedly.

Pika  
(Eww, were those things eating that?)

Rattata  
(Hey, screw you, pet rat! Bet you haven't ever had to work for your living!)

Other Rattata  
(Yeah, little sweetums gets food from a gold plate when it does a trick!)

Third Rattata  
(That sounds kind of nice, actually.)

Other Rattata  
(Well why dontcha go get caught by a trainer, then?)

Rattata  
(Yah, go be a little human kid's toy! Meanwhile we'll be here not making fools of ourselves!)

The Rattatas laugh, while Red keeps walking, ignoring them completely.

Man  
Hey, boy!

Red stops and looks at the man in surprise, not having noticed him.

Man  
You're from Pallet Town, right? When you're visiting Viridian, why not stop by the Pokemon Mart?

Red stares at the man.

Man  
No? You're clearly a Pokemon Trainer. You know, Pokemart has everything you could ever need as a Trainer.  
Pokeballs? Potions? Antidotes? Pokemart has it all. I work there, you know! Here, have a free sample.

The man hands Red a Potion. Red stares at it.

Man  
You a beginner? Do you know how to use Potions?

Red shakes his head.

Pika  
(Ack! I almost fell off! Careful there!)

Man  
It's easy! When a Pokemon is hurt, just spray this on it, and it'll be healed. It's so easy you can   
even use it in the middle of a battle, if you're quick. Got it?

Red nods.

Man  
Good! And if you need more, you can buy them at a Pokemart! Almost every city has a Pokemart nowadays,  
except for the really small ones... you know, like Pallet! Oh, I don't mean anything bad with that, haha!

Red... nods.

Man  
...You're not a very talkative fellow, are you? Uh... can you talk?

Red nods.

Man  
Not a believer in demonstrations, are you? Well, that's okay! Everybody's different, after all!

Red nods and leaves to walk towards Viridian.

Man  
Oh, you're going? See you! Visit the Mart! Buy our stuff! Tell your friends how nice and welcoming we are!

Red nods and keeps walking. Suddenly, a Pidgey appears.

Pidgey  
(Hey, a Trainer kid! What's up, trainer kid? You gonna catch me? You think you can catch me? Huh?  
Huh?)

Red  
Pika. Thundershock.

Pika uses Thundershock. It's Super Effective.

Pidgey  
(Uggh, nobody ever wants to catch me...)

The Pidgey faints.

Pika  
(Poor guy.)

Red keeps walking.

And this ends this short chapter. We zoom up to show a view of the whole Route 1, ledges and all,  
in beautiful sunlight. Some Rattatas can be seen beating up one weaker Rattata, while another one is  
sneakily carrying away a Spearow carcass. This is Route 1. The First Step Between Beginning And End!


	3. Viridian City - The Yellow Bug is Poisonous, the Green Bug Isn't

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red arrives in Viridian City and has some trouble communicating.

The place: Viridian City, Kanto. It's a beautiful day. We can see a city larger than Pallet,  
though that's hardly an accomplishment. Growls of Mankeys and Nidorans can be heard. Men and women  
in black are sneaking around suspiciously, yet unseen by anyone. A tall boy with a Pikachu perched  
on his hat has just arrived in the city, and is looking around himself, confused by all the houses.  
A small boy in a straw hat approaches him.

Boy  
Hey! You want to know about the two different kinds of caterpillar Pokemon?

Red looks at him and shakes his head, confused.

Pika  
(Ack! You know what, I'm moving to your shoulder.)

Pika climbs down from Red's head and settles on his shoulder.

Boy  
Oh... Ok then. It's all I know about...

Red  
Um...

Boy  
What?

Red  
Pokemart?

Boy  
What? What about the Pokemart?

Red  
Where?

Boy  
What? ...Where's the Pokemart? It's right over there, you can't miss it, it has a blue roof... Or it  
would if this wasn't a Game Boy game... Anyway, there you go.

Red nods and starts walking to the Pokemart.

Boy  
Hey! No thanks or anything?

Red stops.

Red  
...Thanks?

Boy  
You're very welcome, thank you very much. Not like I have anything better to do than tell idiots  
where the Mart is...

Red had started walking again, but stops and glares at the boy.

Boy  
All right, sorry, whatever.

Red hmphs and enters the Pokemart.

Clerk  
Welcome! What can I get you?

Red  
...Oak's Parcel.

Clerk  
Pardon?

Red  
...A parcel. For Oak.

Clerk  
Oak? Professor Oak, you mean?

Red nods.

Clerk  
You mean, like, a gift?

Red shakes his head.

Clerk  
Uh... Oh, there's a package for him! Are you here to pick it up?

Red nods.

Clerk  
I see. You got any way of proving you're authorized for that?

Red looks confused.

Clerk  
No? ...Oh well, I'm not paid enough to care. Here you go.

Red receives Oak's Parcel!

Clerk  
All right, are you buying anything?

Red  
...Potion.

Clerk  
Potion, huh? How many of them?

Red  
...Two.

Clerk  
Here you go. That'll be 600 Pokeyen.

Red hands the clerk the money, and receives the Potions, as that is how shopping works.

Clerk  
All right. Is there anything else I can do?

Red shakes his head, and waves at the clerk before leaving.

Clerk  
Thank you, come again.

Pika  
(Why did you get those Potions? I don't think I need any healing.)

Red  
Hm?

Pika  
(It's annoying, I can understand you and talk to you but you can't understand me...)

Red  
Sorry.

Pika  
(What? Did you understand me?)

Red says nothing.

Pika  
(Wishful thinking...)

As Red exits the Pokemart, this chapter ends. We zoom up to see the entirety of Viridian City, a   
moderately-sized city. We can see, amongst other things, a school, a Gym, a Pokecenter and a Pokemart.  
A man in black can be seen dragging a large black bag and dumping it in the pond in the southwest  
part of the city. This is Viridian City. The Eternally Green Paradise.


	4. Pallet Town - Hi-Tech Encyclopedia, Weird Quirks Included

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red finishes his errand and learns how a Pokedex works.

The place: Pallet Town, Kanto. It's a beautiful day. A Gastly can be seen trying its best to attack  
passing Pidgeys and Rattatas, but its attacks don't have any effect. A tall young boy with a Pikachu  
on his shoulder is seen entering Professor Oak's Laboratory. We follow him in. He walks through  
the lab, past the aides who are having a coffee break. Professor Oak is sitting on his computer,  
but turns around and gets up as he hears Red coming.

Oak  
Hello there! Do you have the Parcel?

Red nods and hand Professor Oak his package.

Oak  
Thank you! It's a custom Pokeball from Johto, if you were curious.

Red nods. Suddenly the door slams open and Green storms in.

Green  
Gramps! Gramps, my Pokemon is stronger now! I trained him! Hey, Red, I bet I could beat you now!

Oak  
Green, wait just a minute! No fighting now! I'm giving you two something!

Green  
What? What is it? Another Pokemon? No way is it better than Minamo!

Oak  
That's not it. Here, this is a Pokedex. It's a hi-tech encyclopedia that displays information   
on all Pokemon you see or catch.

Green  
Wow... Hey, Daisy told me about this!

Oak  
That's right, Daisy has helped me in collecting the data. You see, all the Pokedexes have a shared   
databank. Any trainer with a Pokedex who sees a Pokemon records new data about the Pokemon into it.  
Thanks to that, I've gathered information on Pokemon that don't even live in Kanto or Johto! But   
there are still many Pokemon I have no data about, even in Kanto. So that's what I'd like you to do:  
Go on a Pokemon journey and see or catch as many Pokemon as possible!

Green  
I totally understood all of that! So I gotta catch Pokemon? All right, I'll catch cool ones! See ya,  
Red! You still smell!

Green storms off once again.

Oak  
Can't he hold still for more than a minute? Well, Red, are you up to this?

Red shrugs.

Oak  
I'll take that as a yes!! You should go see Daisy before you leave. She can give you advice, if you   
need any.

Red nods, waves and leaves. We follow him to his neighbors house. This is where Green and his sister,  
Daisy, live. Red knocks on the door and waits. There's no answer.

Voice  
Wait just a second!

Red startles and looks around for the source of the voice. Daisy comes around the corner of the house.

Daisy  
Oh, Red! I'm sorry it took some time. I was burying a Rattata. Can you believe it? Somebody had thrown  
away a shoe, and the poor thing choked to death on it! Some people! Now, what did you need?

Red  
Um. ...Map?

Daisy  
Oh, I do have some extra Town Maps! Did Grandpa tell you about them? Come inside. Venus, I'm back!

Venus, the Venusaur sitting in the corner raises her head and mumbles a greeting, then returns to   
her nap.

Daisy  
Green told me he was going to get a Pokemon from Grandpa today. Did you get that Pikachu from Grandpa,  
too?

Red nods.

Daisy  
I knew it. Have you seen Green today? Did he get his Pokemon yet?

Red nods.

Daisy  
So, which Pokemon does he have?

Red  
Poliwag.

Daisy  
Poliwag? Oh, that sounds so cute! Let me check it...

Daisy takes out her Pokedex. A picture of a Poliwag appears on it.

Pokedex  
Eee, a Poliwag! It's so cute! It's a Tadpole Pokemon! It's legs are so ittybitty it likes swimming  
more than walking! Oh, and when it swims, it goes nyoronyoro!

Daisy  
Aww! It suits him well, doesn't it? Oh! Let's check Pikachu...

A picture of a Pikachu appears on Daisy's Pokedex.

Pokedex  
Pikachu! Super cute! It's a mouse Pokemon! When a lot of them gather, they make lightning storms!  
If you yank it's tail, it'll bite you! Oh, and when it eats, it goes chupichipyoichupichipyoi!

Daisy  
Chupi-what? I'm not sure if that's right... But nevermind that! Here's your Town Map!

Red receives the Town Map!

Daisy  
Despite it's name, it shows the whole Kanto region, not just towns! So, Red, what do you need a map  
for? Are you going on a Pokemon journey?

Red  
Mm. Pokedex.

Daisy  
Oh! You have a Pokedex too? May I see it?

Red takes out his Pokedex.

Daisy  
Try to check out some Pokemon with it! Um... try Venusaur!

Red  
Uh... Venusaur.

A picture of a Venusaur appears on Red's Pokedex screen.

Pokedex  
VVVVvvvvvenusaur. Seed Pokemon. Flower back absorb sunray solar energy.

Daisy  
Huh? Well that's a weird one! For some reason, all the Pokedexes have diffent voices and   
speech patterns. Grandpa must've gotten really bored while programming them... Oh! Wait a   
second, I've got an idea!

Daisy goes to another room and returns with some Pokeballs.

Daisy  
Here! Since I don't need these anymore, take these empty Pokeballs! If you're going on a   
Pokemon journey you're sure to need them!

Red receives five Pokeballs!

Red  
...Thanks.

Daisy  
No problem! By the way, would you like some tea?

Red shakes his head.

Daisy  
Oh, are you busy? I bet you can't wait to go on your Pokemon journey! Don't let me keep you here.  
Say hi to Green for me! ...Or don't, I guess.

Red waves to her before leaving. We then move to Red's house, once again. Red enters.

Red's mother  
Oh, Red! You're back! Again! Dinner is ready.

Red  
Ah... Leaving after.

Red's mother  
You're leaving after dinner? Where are you going this time?

Red  
Journey.

Red's mother  
Huh? So you really are leaving! I knew it... I had a feeling since this morning that you'd leave today.

Red  
Mm. Pokedex.

Red's mother  
So it really is about that, then? Anyway, I'm proud of you. You're becoming more independent.

Red  
...Thanks. Ah... I...

Red's mother  
Hm? What is it?

Red  
Uh... Pika...

Pika  
(What?)

Red's mother  
Hm? What about Pika?

Red  
...Can he eat?

Pika  
(Whaaa?! A full sentence!)

Red's mother  
Oh! That's right, what does he eat... Pika, can you eat salad?

Pika  
(Sure. Uh- I mean...)

Pika nods.

Red's mother  
Oh! That's good! I was a bit worried there. Would you like some carrots, Pika?

Pika nods.

Red's mother  
Great! Hee hee... Talking to you is a bit like talking to Red.

Red  
Ah?

Pika  
("Ah?" ...It is!)

Red's mother  
Hahaha! You two make a great pair! Now, sit down, both of you. It's time to eat!

As Red and Pika both dig in, this chapter ends. We exit the house to let them eat in peace and zoom  
upwards to see the whole Pallet Town. It hasn't changed much since the first chapter; same houses, same  
people. A lone Gastly can be seen floating above a small grave marked with a stick. It hovers over it,  
circles around it curiously a few times, before calming down, looking at it approvingly, and then  
disappearing into the thin air. This is Pallet Town. Shades of your journey await!


	5. Super Rare Cheating Pidgey

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Green catches his very first Pokemon!

The place: Route 1. It's a beautiful day. Two groups of Rattatas can be seen growling and glaring  
viciously at each other. If you stood near them and understood Rattata language, you'd hear that the  
subject of this debate is a Spearow. It seems to be only a matter of time until this argument evolves  
into a fully blown civil war. All of this goes completely unnoticed by a passing angry small boy.

Green  
Arrrgh! Stupid Red! He's so... so... sooooo STUPID! And DUMB! Minamo is way cooler than that stupid rat  
he's got! So we should've won! Right, Minamo?

Minamo  
(...)

Green  
Yeah! We should've! We would've won if he hadn't cheated! Okay! I'm going to catch some other Pokemon  
and it'll be cooler than anything he ever catches and then we'll win and he'll be sorry! Hey, cool  
Pokemon! Come over here, I'm going to catch you!

Suddenly, a Pidgey appears.

Pidgey  
(Cool Pokemon? That'd be me.)

Green  
Wow, who's that cool Pokemon?! I bet it's super rare! Grandpa probably has no info on that on his Pokedex!  
I'll catch it! Go, Pokeball!

Green throws a Pokeball. It sucks the Pidgey in.

Green  
Yesss! I caught it I caught it!

The Pokeball bursts open and releases the Pidgey.

Green  
What? Hey! Stupid bird! You cheated!

Pidgey  
(What.)

Green  
No, wait! I'm supposed to battle it first and then catch it! Yeah, that's what Daisy said! Go, Minamo!

Pidgey  
(Hey.)

Minamo  
(...)

Pidgey  
(What? Not talkative? Or silenced by the amazing me?)

Green  
Minamo! Use Bubble!

Minamo does so.

Pidgey  
(Ow! Heh, you asked for it.)

Pidgey uses Gust.

Green  
Yeah! It's not cheating anymore! Minamo! Use Bubble again!

Minamo uses Bubble.

Pidgey  
(Blagh! ...Hey, it's unsettling if you're not talking. Sand-Attack!)

Pidgey uses Sand-Attack. Minamo's accuracy lowers.

Green  
Hey! That's cheating! That's definitely cheating! Take this! Go, Pokeball!

Pidgey  
(Wait what-)

Pidgey is sucked into the Pokeball. The ball rolls around a little, before settling down.

Green  
Huh? Hey... Did I catch it? Minamo, did I catch it?

Minamo nods, blinking his eyes.

Green  
...Yeeaaahhh! I caught it! I caught my first Pokemon! Awesome!

Green hugs the surprised Minamo.

Minamo  
(Wha-!)

Pidgey  
(Hey? I heard you talk! So you can do it.)

Minamo  
(!)

Green  
Oh yeah, I gotta name this Pokemon! I wonder what it is?

Pokedex  
Dat a Pidgey, yo. Not rare at all. 

Green  
I don't CARE! Stupid Pokedex! It's cool, so I don't care! I'll give it a cool name! Like... Za... Zachary!  
That's cool!

Zachary the Pidgey  
(Oh, not bad, I guess. Zachary. Yeah, got a nice ring to it.)

Green  
Okay! Return, Minamo! Let's go beat up Red! We can beat his stupid rat up now that we've got Zach!

Zachary  
(...Hey? Did you just make a nickname of my nickname?)

Minamo  
(Hmhm.)

Zachary  
(Was that a laugh?)

Minamo  
(...No.)

Zachary  
(Sounded awfully much like a laugh. Hey, I'm not saying it's bad! It sounded good, you know.)

Minamo  
(...)

Zachary  
(I mean, not like that. I'm not into amphipods. Sorry to dash your hopes.)

Minamo  
(...Um?)

As Green is making his way towards Viridian City completely unaware of the awkward moment going on in his  
Pokeballs, we pan up to see a view of Route 1 in all its beauty. A group of Rattatas can be seen, celebrating  
their victory over the dead bodies of other Rattatas. Just then, a lump of grass rises up from the ground,  
surprising them. Before the Rattatas even realize it's an Oddish, they are slaughtered. The Oddish smiles  
it's vacant smile, tottering off to who knows where. This is Route 1. The First Step Between Beginning And End!


	6. Viridian City - Cinnabar Shoreline Is Beautiful This Time Of The Year

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red meets a coffee-loving old man and goes to school.

The place: Viridian City. It's a beautiful day. Some young trainers can occasionally be seen coming into  
the town from the north, carrying rapidly weakening, twitching Pokemon to the Pokemon Center, praying  
they'll make it. A tall young boy with a Pikachu on his shoulder is walking through the city.

Old man  
Wait just a second there, sonny!

Red  
Ah...?!

Old man  
I've had my coffee and I feel great!

Red looks at him, confused.

Old man  
I see you've got a Pokemon. Did you catch it yourself?

Red shakes his head.

Old man  
Have you caught any Pokemon yourself?

Red shakes his head again.

Old man  
Well then, let me show you how to do it! Look at that, a Weedle just appeared!

Red  
Uh... Rattata?

Old man  
. . . Ah! I do believe that might be a Rattata, now that I take a closer look! Anyway, look at this.

Old man throws a Pokeball at the Rattata. The Rattata is sucked in, but breaks out immediately.

Old man  
Huh? ...Ah, that's right, I forgot! You have to weaken it at first! Silly old me!

Woman  
Grandpa! Are you harassing passing trainers again?

Old man  
It's not harassing, it's educating!

Woman  
You really need to stop that, it's embarrassing... Come on, let's go home!

Old man  
I'l go home when I feel like it! Now, sonny, if you want become a great trainer, you might want to  
first visit the Trainers' School over there, study a little, and then try to catch a Pokemon over   
there at Route 22.

Red nods.

Woman  
You don't need to humor him, I'm sorry about this... Geez, Grandpa, if you aren't lying on the ground  
not letting anyone pass, you're harassing people... Why can't you just be good for a minute?

Old man  
Maybe if I got better coffee, I might!

Woman  
Don't be silly, grandpa... Let's just go.

The woman starts dragging her grandpa away.

Old man  
Hey, sonny! If you ever have the chance, surf on the coastline of Cinnabar City!

Red nods, and turns to leave. Unnoticed by anyone, a girl hiding in the bushes takes notes of what just  
happened, then sneaks after the old man and his granddaughter. Suddenly, the sneaking girl's hand  
disappears, her notebook falling on the ground. She swears in words that do not exist, extending her  
arm and staring at it. The hand reappears, then is replaced by static, then reappears again. The girl picks  
up her notebook, then realizes she's lost sight of her target. She sighs, then walks off. But Red, not  
noticing her, enters the nearby Trainers' School.

Teacher  
Hey there! Are you hoping to study here?

Red nods hesitantly.

Teacher  
Hmm, you might be bit too old. How old are you?

Red  
Twelve.

Teacher  
Twelve? That young? I thought you were at least fifteen! Kids these days, huh... All right, let's see  
how much you know about Pokemon. What's this Pokemon?

The teacher holds up an image of a Poliwag.

Red  
Poliwag.

Teacher  
Correct. What type is it?

Red  
Water.

Teacher  
Correct. What attacks can it learn?

Red  
...Bubble?

Teacher  
What else?

Red looks confused.

Teacher  
Amongst others, Poliwag can learn Water Gun, Hypnosis and Doubleslap. It seems you know a bit about  
Pokemon already.

A girl who was trying to study raises her hand.

Teacher  
Yes, Esther?

Esther  
That wasn't really knowledge about Pokemon, it was knowledge about Poliwags.

Teacher  
Wha? Oh! Uh.... I was testing if you'd notice, hahaha... A short test like that really doesn't show   
much of a person's knowledge. Now, uh... What's your name?

Red  
...Red.

Teacher  
All right, Red. Here's a small written test. The paper has images of different Pokemon on it. Write  
underneath the images the name of the Pokemon and it's type.

The teacher gives Red a paper and a pen. Some time passes.

Teacher  
...Red, have you finished it?

Red looks at the teacher.

Teacher  
...Let me see it. ...How is it possible you only know the name of Rattata, yet you know every single  
one of their types?

Red looks confused.

Red  
...Easy?

Teacher  
Is it? Hm. Anyway, these Pokemon are, from left to right, Rattata, Beedrill, Ivysaur, Nidoking, Wigglytuff,  
Seel, Electabuzz, Primeape, Pinsir and Arcanine. Next up, your fighting knowledge. What types are strong  
against water?

Red  
? Electric, grass?

Teacher  
Correct. What types is flying strong against?

Red  
Grass, bug, fighting?

Teacher  
Correct again. What type is especially powerful against a fire/flying type Pokemon?

Red  
...Rock?

Teacher  
...Correct. Again. What type is a Mr. Mime?

Red says nothing.

Teacher  
...How about a Magikarp?

Red says nothing.

Teacher  
Your knowledge seems to be very... specialized. Or could it be... instinct?

Red  
?

Teacher  
...I have to test this. One. Final. Question.

The teacher holds up a photograph of something.

Teacher  
The... Pokemon in this image. What type is it.

Red looks at it for a while.

Red  
...Bird, water.

Teacher  
Bird? Bird is not a Pokemon type!

Red  
Mm.

Teacher  
You must have meant flying, right?

Red  
No. Bird.

Teacher  
But that's not...

The teacher looks at the photo.

Teacher  
Red. How exactly did you deduce this Pokemon's type?

Red shrugs.

Teacher  
...All right. You're... I don't think I need to teach you anything.

Red looks at the teacher, confused.

Teacher  
You heard me. You've got a rare skill. With your instinctive knowledge on types, I'm sure training Pokemon  
is easy for you.

Red nods.

Red  
...Thanks.

Teacher  
You're welcome. ...Err, are you absolutely sure it's Bird-type?

Red nods.

Teacher  
...What type is a Pidgey?

Red  
Normal, flying.

Teacher  
Okay. Good. You can go now. Dismissed.

Red waves at her and leaves. She leans against her table, a hand on her head, eyebrows furrowed.

Teacher  
Bird? Is that really...? I have to tell somebody...

Student  
...So like, can we go home too?

Teacher  
Oh, right, class dismissed!

The students rush out. Thus ends Red's short adventure in education and this chapter, as well.   
As Red exits the school, we zoom up to see the whole Viridian City. We can see a boy desperately   
hurrying towards the Pokecenter, only for the Mankey in his arms to let out a bloodcurling   
scream of pain and faint. The boy collapses on all fours, sobbing as he cradles the mankey. This   
is Viridian City. The Eternally Green Paradise.


	7. Route 22 - Hi Green! Bye Green!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red battles Green, catches a new Pokemon, and finds a goal to aim towards.

The place: Route 22. It's a passably nice day. Mankeys can be seen engaging in fisticuffs, encouraged  
by Rattatas and a blue Nidoran. A tall boy with a Pikachu on his shoulder walks past a scene like this.

Pika  
(Hey! Who's winning?)

Nidoran  
(Louise!)

Pika  
(Cool, that's the one with the shorter tail, right?)

Nidoran  
(Yeah, that's her!)

Pika  
(Kick some butt, Louise!)

Louise the Mankey  
(With pleasure!)

Louise then delivers a smashing uppercut, knocking the other Mankey out.

Nidoran  
(That was great! Hey, where are you going?)

Pika  
(Oh, well as you can see I'm here on a trainer. Where he goes, I go.)

Nidoran  
(Well, I'll follow you for now, then. What's your name?)

Pika  
(It's Pika. What about you?)

Nidoran  
(I'm Nickie! So you're trained? Tell me how it is!)

Pika  
(Oh, I just met him earlier today. I was living at a laboratory before, and this is better than that,  
at least. Red here is a nice guy. Quiet, but nice.)

Nickie  
(He looks so cool! Is he strong?)

Pika  
(Uh, I don't know? Maybe?)

Nickie  
(Oh right, you just met him, huh?)

Red  
...?

Nickie  
(Hiya, Red!)

Nickie waves at Red.

Red  
...?

Red hesitantly waves back.

Nickie  
(Hee hee! He's polite!)

Red smiles. Suddenly Green!

Green  
RED! I'm going to beat you this time! You can't cheat anymore because I've got Zach! Let's fight, come on!

Red  
...

Nickie  
(Who the heck is that?)

Pika  
(Oh, that's, uh... Green, I guess.)

Green  
Go, Zach!

Zachary  
(Ba-bam! The amazing Zachary, or, uh, Zach, is here!)

Pika  
(...)

Red  
...Pika.

Pika  
(Right. I choose me! Go, Pika! ...That's how it should go.)

Zachary  
(An electric-type? Well, shit.)

Nickie  
(Hey, don't give up that easily! You can still win with a good strategy!)

Zachary  
(That's true, whoever you are! I can do this!)

Green  
Zach! Use Sand-Attack! That's a strong attack, right?

Nickie  
(...Okay, you might be screwed.)

Zachary sighs, and half-heartedly kicks some sand at Pika.

Red  
Thundershock.

Pika used Thundershock. It's super-effective. Zachary fainted!

Green  
What?! Reeeedd! You're still cheating! That's no fair! Go, Minamo!

Minamo  
(.......)

Pika  
(Hey.)

Minamo  
(Hello.)

Green  
Minamo, use Bubble!

Red  
Pika, Thundershock.

The battle goes exactly as their previous one.

Green  
Noooo! Red, you stupid stupid stupid cheater! You... you... poopiepants! I'm not playing with you anymore! Minamo,  
return! I'm leaving! Smell you later!

Green storms off.

Nickie  
(That was a good battle! I guess your trainer is pretty good! Would you mind if I came along?)

Pika  
(Depends on him, really...)

Red  
...

Red throws a Pokeball at Nickie. Nickie is caught in it.

Nickie  
(I guess he likes the idea!)

Red  
Nickie.

Nickie  
(Yep, that's me. Red, right? Glad to be here!)

Red smiles.

Pika  
(...Hey, wait. Can you understand Pokemon, Red?)

Red  
?

Pika  
(...Nevermind. Just... Keep doing what you were doing.)

Red keeps walking forward. He ends up in front of a large building. A guard is standing in front of it.

Guard  
Hey, what are you doing here? You can't pass if you don't have the Boulderbadge!

Red  
?

Guard  
What? You don't know what the Boulderbadge is? This is the Pokemon League, kid. Trainers that have earned 8 Gym Badges  
from Pokemon Gyms in different towns can try to challenge the Elite Four here!

Red  
Ah.

Guard  
You want to know where Boulderbadge can be won at? Pewter City!

Red  
?

Guard  
It's to the north of Viridian, beyond Viridian Forest.

Red nods and walks away.

Guard  
I sure am glad I took that class on Silent Protagonist-ese in college. It's been surprisingly useful!

Nickie  
(So, wait. Are we going to try for the Elite Four?)

Pika  
(Seems so...)

Nickie  
(With a beginning trainer and only two Pokemon?)

Pika  
(Yes.)

Nickie  
(Hell yeah.)

As Red has accepted a challenge, this chapter ends. We fly up to view the Pokemon league in all its glory, the place that all trainers  
dream to one day enter. A Dragonite with a cape can be seen flying around the league, its currently-capeless trainer chasing after  
it on foot, somehow barely managing to keep up. Anyone seeing this strange sight might be completely oblivious to two bruised  
Mankeys slumped on the ground, still weakly attempting to trade blows. Their audience has long ago scattered in favor of more  
interesting things, such as dropped berries and trash. This is Route 22. The Road to Championship.


	8. Viridian Forest - Insult Pokemon Fighting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Green catches a Pokemon. Nickie destroys a man with words.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: this chapter contains some sexist language.

The place: Viridian Forest. It's a fairly nice day. Bug catching youths can be seen all around, trying to get their hands on the various bugs in the forest with deadly seriousness. The forest's hierarchy can almost be seen with bare eyes, as camps of Caterpie and Metapod users glare at Weedle and Kakuna lovers, and argue their respective merits. Some have no preference, and are ostracized by all others. Anyone going in and carelessly outing themselves as preferring Venonat or Paras may not come out. 

Bug Catcher  
Hey you!

Red stops mid-step.

Red  
?

Bug Catcher  
I'm here with some friends! They're out for Pokemon battles!

Red  
...?

Bug Catcher  
...That's all. Keep walking.

Red  
?

Bug Catcher  
Stop staring at me! I get anxious when people stare at me!

Red closes his eyes.

Bug Catcher  
That's not better! Waah!

Bug Catcher runs away.

Nickie  
(Whoa, look at him go.)

Pika  
(Why did he even start talking to Red?)

Red opens his eyes, looks around in slight confusion, and then keeps walking. He sees Green in the distance and stops.

Green  
I did it! I caught a Caterpie! Awesome! I bet it's rare!

Caterpie  
(Uh, not at all.)

Green  
I'm gonna call him Coriander! Red will be so jealous when he hears about my awesome Caterpie! Right, Corey?

Coriander  
(Who's he talking to?)

Zachary  
(You, buddy.)

Coriander  
(Eh? But he just called me "Coriander", that's a beautiful name by the way, I love it, and then he said "Corey"! Which one is it?)

Zachary  
(Yeah, it's called a double nickname, only the coolest of cool guys have them. By the way, my name's Zachary, also called Zach! And that's Minamo.)

Minamo  
(...)

Zachary  
(Whoa, scary face.)

Coriander  
(Eek.)

Green  
All right! With all of you I'll beat Red no doubt! Let's go, Zach, Corey, Minnie!

Minamo  
(...)

Zachary  
(Whoa, cute face.)

Coriander  
(Eek~)

Minamo  
(Shut up...)

Before Green sees him, Red turns away and keeps walking without a word.

Pika  
(Whew, managed to dodge him.)

Lass  
Eek!!

Red  
!?

Red stops in mid-step.

Lass  
...You have a Pikachu! Oh my gosh! It's so cute! I haven't found one! Want to trade?

Red shakes his head.

Lass  
No? Then... let's battle! Go, Julio!

Julio the Nidoran M  
(Haa! Let's go, let's gooo!)

Red throws Nickie's Pokeball.

Nickie  
(Hee hee! Hiya!)

Julio  
(Whoa! Oh man, you're way better than that Romelette cow!)

Nickie  
(Really? Gosh, I could blush! If you weren't both gross and ugly.)

Julio  
(Agh! C- critical hit...)

Julio used Flirt! Nickie used LIMIT BREAK LV3: ANTIFLIRT! Julio fainted!

Lass  
H-hey, wait, what? The battle didn't even start yet!

Nickie  
(I'm just that good.)

Pika  
(Wow...)

Lass  
Hmph! Return, Julio! Go, Romelette!

Romelette the Nidoran F  
(You're a bitch, huh? Don't think I'll go down as easy as him.)

Nickie  
(Wow! I thought he was just a woman-hater, but you really are a cow!)

Romelette  
(Oh it's on now, bitch.)

Nickie  
(Repeating the same insult over and over? Geez, and here I thought this might turn out fun!)

Romelette  
(Talk is cheap! Put your mouth where my fist is!)

Nickie  
(Oh my! Flirting all of a sudden?)

Romelette  
(N-no! Shut up! Fight me!!)

Romelette uses Tackle! Nickie uses Tackle!

Nickie  
(You even fight like a cow.)

Romelette  
(How appropriate. You fight like a dairy farmer.)

Pika  
(You both fight the same!)

Nickie  
(Oh, don't tease the poor dairy farmer.)

Romelette  
(Grrrr...)

Romelette uses Growl! Nickie uses Tackle!

Romelette  
(Y-you son of a-!)

Nickie  
(Son of a...? Geez, you've run so out of insults you're calling me a dude? What a disappointment...)

Romelette  
(Grh... Asshole!)

Romelette uses Tackle! Nickie uses Tackle! Romelette faints!

Nickie  
(Ha! Nickie wins again!)

Lass  
Aww! I was going to ask you to trade again if I won... Oh well, here's your money!

Red accepts the money, though he's a bit confused.

Lass  
I've been looking forever, and I can't find a Pikachu! I wonder if I'm just in the wrong version or something?

Red  
...

Red starts walking off.

Lass  
Yeah, don't mind me, I'll just walk to the Pokemon Center all by myself... A helpless, cute girl, all alone... He's not coming back, is he.

Pika  
(You're pretty strong, Nickie.)

Nickie  
(Hee hee! I wasn't the winner of this year's Nidoran gladiator matches for my looks!)

Pika  
(Nidoran gladiator matches? Those exist?)

Nickie  
(Of course. Didn't you see the Mankey gladiators earlier?)

Pika  
(Wow, so it was that big of a thing...)

Nickie  
(It's not that big. It's just something we do at Route 22 to pass time. I don't know if there's anything like that elsewhere.)

Red walks past some Bug Catchers.

Bug Catcher  
Sometimes you can find stuff on the ground! I'm looking for the piece of cake I dropped!

Other Bug Catcher  
Caterpie can't cut it! But Beedrill can learn Cut! That's why Weedle is better!

Third Bug Catcher  
Yo! If you can't slam with the best, you gotta jam with me if you're a Pokemon Trainer!

Red  
...?

Third Bug Catcher  
What I'm saying is fight me.

Red  
Ah.

Pika  
(It's going to be a long trip through this forest...)

As Red prepares to battle the bug catcher, we fly up to see the great Viridian Forest, in it's full glory. A boy can be seen carrying a Wurmple on his shoulder, earning glares from several hardcore Bug Catchers. Suddenly a black shadow appears from nowhere, and the Wurmple-owning boy is knocked out. The shadow materializes behind the body, revealing itself to be a ninja. A Bug Catcher walks up to the ninja, handing him a stack of bills. The ninja bows and disappears. The Wurmple cries over its fallen trainer, ignored by all passersby, who are busy arguing about their favored bug-types. This is Viridian Forest. A Natural Maze.


	9. Pewter City - Glitches and Dick Jokes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red goes to a museum, finds out about glitches, then goes to the Gym.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: As you might guess from the title, this chapter contains some immature sex jokes. Thanks, Nickie.

The place: Pewter City. It's a nice day. A small gang of people dressed in black are grouped in the eastern side of the city, listening to instructions from a man in white. They salute, and head east, towards a mountain. But these people are, of course, not of any importance at all. Let's move to the southwest a bit, where we see Red exiting the Pokemon Center.

Nickie  
(Ahh, wasn't that refreshing? So that's a healing machine. Never seen one before!)

Pika  
(How do you get healed in the wild?)

Nickie  
(Oh you know, eating berries, resting, drinking from miraculous healing springs... The usual stuff!)

Pika  
(That's usual...?)

Nickie  
(A trained Pokemon's not used to that kind of stuff, huh?)

Pika  
(The professor had a healing machine, but he kept it hidden away most of the time since one of his assistants broke it every time she got close.)

Nickie  
(The professor? Who's that, your old trainer?)

Pika  
(Yes. Professor Oak. I guess he's famous with humans or something?)

Nickie  
(You don't sound sure.)

Pika  
(I'm not. Hey, what's this place?)

Red has found a Museum! Put Museum in the Key Item Pocket. ...Wait, no. Anyway, Red enters the museum. A scientist sits behind a counter, grumbling to himself.

Scientist  
A PhD in archeology and this is what it amounts to... When I've resurrected that Aerodactyl I'll show them all.. Oh, didn't see you there. Welcome to the museum. How old are you?

Red  
Twelve.

Scientist  
Poppycock. How old are you really?

Red shows his ID.

Scientist  
...Well I'll be. A kid's ticket is 50 P. Want one?

Red nods and buys a ticket. He then enters the museum proper.

Nickie  
(Look, skeletons!)

Pika  
(I don't want to see that...)

Red takes a closer look at the fossils. A girl we've seen before somewhere is taking notes of them next to him, mumbling to herself.

Girl  
Yes, it's completely identical... The bones all match, and the wing has a fracture in exactly the same place...

Red  
?

Girl  
Hm? Don't mind me... But haven't I seen you before?

Red  
...?

Girl  
Those dots and the audible question mark... You're none other than Red, aren't you?

Red nods, confused.

Girl  
I didn't expect you to remember me. I'm Yellow, one of Professor Oak's assistants.

Pika  
(That's her! The one who breaks machines!)

Nickie  
(How convenient that we just happened to meet her!)

Yellow  
I'm researching glitches. They're basically errors in the universe itself. Right now I'm comparing these fossils to a Glitch Pokemon that appears in Cinnabar, taking various forms. These fossils look the same as two of its forms. Look...

Yellow shows Red photographs of an Aerodactyl and Kabutops Skeleton on the edge of water.

Pika  
(Ahhhh!! Put them away!)

Nickie  
(They're just photos, don't worry.)

Pika  
(They're alive, and they're right next to us! Ahhhhhh!)

Nickie  
(There, there.)

Yellow  
By the way, could you take some photos of these fossils with my camera?

Red nods and takes the camera Yellow gives him.

Yellow  
Thank you. I'd take them myself, but any photos I take often get corrupted. I guess you could say it's a side effect of my research.

Red takes photos while Yellow tells him what to photograph. A few photos later...

Yellow  
That's enough. I guess they'll have to do, even though you're not that good of a photographer.

Nickie  
(Don't complain about free assistance!)

Pika  
(Yeah! Like they say, don't look in the mouth of a gift Rapidash.)

Nickie  
(Yeah, that'll get you a Flamethrower in the face!)

Pika  
(...That's not the point here.)

Nickie  
(By the way, do you know what Pokemon that is? The one Yellow has?)

Pika  
(Hm? That's...)

H'Poke  
(ROCKET%& /& 'M Y&(=GY 7 Poké ¤)

Pika  
(...I haven't the slightest idea.)

Nickie  
(My eyes are starting to hurt.)

Pika  
(Look away!)

Nickie  
(I can't!)

Yellow  
I'm leaving now. There's a space exhibit on the second floor, but I'm not interested in that.

Yellow leaves, true to her word.

Nickie  
(Phew, it's gone.)

Pika  
(You mean the Pokemon, right? Because otherwise that's a really rude thing to say.)

Nickie  
(Of course I mean the crime against nature, I mean, Pokemon!)

Pika  
(Okay. In that case, I agree.)

Red climbs the stairs to the second floor of the museum. There's a huge space shuttle and a meteorite exhibited.

Nickie  
(Hmm? I'm feeling something in the air! That big rock, could it be...?)

Pika  
(What? What is it?)

Nickie  
(Wait until we get closer, I need to check something!)

Red walks up to the meteorite to see it closer.

Nickie  
(This is it! It's definitely Moon Stone!)

Pika  
(An evolution stone? How do you know?)

Nickie  
(I can feel it from here. What a sight, a huge rock of Moon Stone! We Nidoran gather every full Moon to gaze upon it.)

Pika  
(Like a moon-viewing festival?)

Nickie  
(Huh? Yeah, I guess that'd describe it. We make wishes to the Moon and sing songs in its honor, and it thanks us by sending pieces of itself in a shooting star so that we can become stronger. Those pieces are called Moon Stones.)

Pika  
(Wow, sounds nice. So you can feel it? I wonder if I could feel a Thunderstone if I was near one.)

Nickie  
(I guess we can't take a piece of that Moon Stone with us, huh? It'd be nice...)

Pika  
(Maybe we'll find one. The sign says it was found in Mt. Moon, and I think that's fairly close to this city. We might visit it.)

Nickie  
(Maybe, I think, and might? That's too many uncertainties for my taste.)

Pika  
(...I'm a cautious Pikachu, so sue me.)

A Random Old Man  
The first moon landing was in July 20th, 1969!

Red thinks "nice" but says nothing.

A Random Old Man  
I bought me a color TV to see it!

Red nods and leaves.

A Random Old Man  
I still have that TV! It's my only friend. Hey, where'd you go, sonny? Come back! I want to spout trivia at somebody!

As it turns out, Red went outside. He's heading to Route 3.

Boy  
Hey!! You're a trainer! I know it because I've seen a lot of trainers in my day! You're going to challenge Brock!

Red shakes his head.

Boy  
Don't talk back! You're going to challenge that Gym Leader right now, and I'm going to take you there!

The boy drags the confused Red to the Gym.

Boy  
Brock! You've got a challenger! He's a million lightyears away from you!

Brock  
Really? Well darn, that's far away! How am I going to make it that far in my lifetime?

Boy  
........He strong.

Red stares at him.

Boy  
I swear.

Red stares at Brock.

Brock  
Hiya there.

Red waves at Brock.

Boy  
Well? Whatcha waiting for? Challenge him!

Guy with glasses  
I'll help you out by telling you something completely useless! YOU CAN SEND OUT A DIFFERENT POKEMON FIRST

Red  
...

Red walks up to Brock.

Brock  
Hi.

Red  
...Battle?

Brock  
Oh, sure. I hope you're good! A lot of people challenge me with just a couple of Weedles and Caterpies, it's a sad sight! The last strong trainer was that one kid with a Poliwag. But hey, you're not here to listen to me yak, are you? I mean I could yak all day, sure, but now's not the time for it! Go, Geoduck!

Red  
Nickie.

Nickie  
(We're on!)

Geoduck the Geodude  
(Hey, tell me the truth. Is my trainer actually blind, or do I look like a Psyduck?)

Nickie  
(Nope, you look like a dick.)

Geoduck  
(What? Rude! I'll show you dick! ...No, that came out wrong.)

Nickie  
(What did, your dick?)

Geoduck  
(Please, just forget I said anything. Let's make this official Gym battle at least a little classy.)

Geoduck used Tackle! Nickie used Double Kick!

Nickie  
(Ow, you're hard.)

Geoduck  
(I hear that a lot.)

Nickie  
(Pfft!)

Geoduck  
(Wait, I mean- Dammit! Stop that!)

Nickie used Double Kick! Geoduck used Tackle!

Geoduck  
(Ugh... I'm finished.)

Nickie  
(Blew your load early?)

Geoduck  
(Watch it... you might need those remarks later.)

Geoduck faints!

Brock  
Gosh, you aren't just an everyday trainer, are you? I'd better get serious too! Go, Hardsnake!

Hardsnake the Onix  
(Ga-roar.)

Nickie  
(...Hardsnake? Really? I don't think I even need to say anything.)

Hardsnake  
(Ga-roar.)

Nickie  
(...My, you're big. I guess. It's no fun when it's too easy.)

Hardsnake used Bide! Nickie used Double Kick!

Pika  
(Ah, watch out! Don't attack now, you'll regret it!)

Nickie  
(Huh? He doesn't seem to be doing anything... Well, all right...)

Nickie used Growl! Hardsnake is storing energy!

Nickie  
(Still nothing...)

Hardsnake released stored power! Hardsnake used Bide!

Nickie  
(Gah!)

Pika  
(It bid its time and then released the power it was storing! That's the move Bide!)

Nickie  
(Released, huh... It's no good, I'm too in pain to make anything of that...)

Pika  
(Is that really your first concern...?)

Red  
...Nickie.

Nickie  
(Hm?)

Red used a Potion!

Nickie  
(Huh? Hey, I'm feeling better.)

Hardsnake used Bide!

Nickie  
(Again? Boring.)

Nickie used Growl! Hardsnake is storing power! And that happens again. Hardsnake releases stored power! But it flops!

Nickie  
(Heh, he's all flaccid now. Let's end this!)

Nickie used Double Kick! Hardsnake fainted!

Nickie  
(All out of stamina. What a disappointment.)

Pika  
(I'm glad I didn't understand most of that battle.)

Brock  
Well, you've done it! You've won the Boulderbadge! In fact, here you go, it's the previously mentioned Boulderbadge!

Red got the Boulderbadge! Fanfare!

Brock  
Equipping that makes your Pokemon stronger because badges are magical! And here, have 2000 P. And, heck! Have a TM34 too! It's Bide. I love it because it's so strong. And hard. Like a rock!

Red accepts the things Brock gives him.

Boy  
I can't believe you beat Brock! But he's still hotter than you.

Guy with glasses  
DID I HELP

Red  
...

Brock  
You sure are strong! You should go to every Gym in Kanto and challenge the Gym Leaders because you're so strong! Like in Cerulean City! It's past Mt. Moon! I sometimes go there and look for fossils because there are so many fossils in there and fossils are tough like rocks! Because they are rocks! And they used to be Pokemon! And I like rocks and Pokemon!

Red  
Mt. Moon...

Nickie  
(Mt. Moon! Let's go there!!)

Brock  
Yep, that Mt. Moon sure is something! So what's your name, tall, dark and silent guy?

Guy in glasses  
ME?

Brock  
No! I mean this guy! I need his name so I can carve the name of every trainer who ever beat me into a rock! A statue-shaped rock!

Red  
...Red.

Brock  
Red! I bet that's your name, because I don't see anything red in here except for your clothes! Lemme carve that into this rock that's shaped like a statue of a Rhydon, right below Green. There! I've carved it, because I'm a fast carver!

Red  
...

Red has had enough of these people and leaves the Gym to head to Mt. Moon. Brock and the other two dudes wave after him, and we zoom out of the Gym and up to the sky to view the entire Pewter City. The black-clad people from earlier have long since left, as has their leader. All of them are now in the tall mountain seen far away: Mount Moon. The place where this entire chapter has pointed out as Red's next destination. But let's not worry about the future. This is Pewter City. A Stone Gray City.

* * *

_Image description: A picture of Yellow, who resembles a female Cooltrainer from Gen 1 games. Parts of her are visibly glitching._


	10. Route 3 - Jigglypuffs are Good Eatin'

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red encounters a legendary trainer, then meets some new Pokemon.

The place: Route 3. It's a beautiful day. Spearows are chirping, Mankeys are boxing, Jigglypuffs are singing, all Pokemon near the Jigglypuffs are falling asleep. As the Jigglypuffs crowd around their prey, a boy and his Pikachu walk to the Route.

Youngster  
Hey, you!

Red stops.

Lass  
Eek! It's Ben! Everyone, Ben's challenging someone!

Another Youngster  
Ben? Wow! I gotta see this!

Bug Catcher  
Oh man, oh wow! It's Ben! I've only heard rumors, I can't believe I'm seeing this!

Trainers crowd around Red and Ben the Youngster.

Ben  
Quiet, everyone. Don't interrupt the maestro.

The people quiet down.

Ben  
I'm only going to say this once. Hi.

Red  
?

Ben  
I like shorts. They're comfy and easy to wear!

The crowd goes wild.

Lass  
EEEE! He said it! Oh gosh!

Youngster  
Ben! Ben! You're the best, Ben!

Bug Catcher  
Wow! I heard it! He said it! Ahhh!

Red  
...?

Ben takes out a Pokeball.

Red  
Ah. Pika.

Pika  
(If it's a battle you want...)

What followed next was an utterly ordinary and forgettable battle against a Youngster. Rattatas were involved.

Ben  
*falls to his knees*

Youngster  
I can't believe it! Ben was beaten!

Bug Catcher  
Oh wow! I saw that guy earlier in Viridian Forest! I bet he won thanks to his training there! I better go back.

Lass  
He's never lost before... What's he going to say now?

The crowd looks at Ben with expectation.

Ben  
.........You... Are you...

The crowd holds their breath.

Ben  
....Are you storing your Pokemon on PC? Each box can fit 20 Pokemon.

Lass  
...

Youngster  
...

Bug Catcher  
...

The crowd wanders off.

Ben  
No! My adoring fans! This is all your fault! ...Huh?

Red has already wandered off.

Ben  
Where did he go? Was he never there to begin with?

Dun-dun-dunnn... Meanwhile, Red keeps walking, but stops when he sees a Spearow in the middle of the road.

Spearow  
(Don't mind me. Just scavenging.)

Red  
...Nickie.

Nickie is sent out.

Nickie  
(Let's rock.)

Spearow  
(Another trainer wants to fight me? What a bother.)

Nickie uses Scratch! Spearow uses Peck!

Nickie  
(Is that all you've got?)

Spearow  
(Yeah, that's all I've got. Let's just end this here if you don't mind.)

Nickie  
(Sorry, I'm not the one who decides that!)

Spearow  
(You're not getting me. It's better to end this now, for you and your trainer. We Spearows aren't too friendly when our kin is attacked. So if this battle keeps up, you're going to be under attack by every Spearow nearby. Capiche?)

Nickie  
(Kawhat?)

Spearow  
(Get it?)

Nickie  
(Oh! Yeah, I get it. But, uh, like I said...) *looks at Red*

Red throws a Pokeball. Spearow is sucked inside.

Nickie  
(Oh he wants to catch you! That's good, then. It'll end the battle, right?)

Spearow  
(...Yeah.)

Pokeball  
Click!

Red caught a Spearow!

Nickie  
(Welcome aboard! What's your name?)

Spearow  
(I'm Rowina. You?)

Nickie  
(I'm Nickie, that's Pika, and the trainer's Red!)

Red  
...Rowina.

Red calls Nickie back to her Pokeball and keeps walking.

Rowina  
(Hah. This is a change, all right. This morning I was just wondering what I'd eat today. Didn't think I'd be watching the world through a reddish filter by the evening.)

Nickie  
(It's not too bad, is it?)

Rowina  
(Can't say yet. Still wondering what I'll eat.)

Nickie  
(We usually eat something at the Pokecenters, so that's taken care of.)

Rowina  
(So that's where humans eat? I'd wondered why I never see them look for food. There's one of those centers near the mountain. I've never been inside.)

Nickie  
(I hadn't either, until I was caught! Humans have all these weird, convenient things they build. There's a machine in the centers that heals all your wounds, can you believe it?)

Rowina  
(I'd heard rumors. It's hard to believe, but I'm going to see one with my own eyes. Can't be a sceptic like that. It should be right over there.)

Pika  
(I see it!)

Red enters the Pokemon Center. It's full of people, and a nearby man is talking loudly on the phone.

Man on Phone  
What? Team Rocket is on Mt. Moon? Team Rocket attacks Cerulean citizens? Damn that Team Rocket, always on the news! I should be the one on the front page! What's the use in teaching an Electabuzz to play the violin if nobody cares?

Red goes and heals his Pokemon.

Rowina  
(Well, that was it, then. Nothing will ever surprise me again.)

Nickie  
(Ha ha, what?)

Shady Man  
Psst! Kid, come over here!

Red  
?

Red goes over there.

Shady Man  
Do I have the greatest deal for you, sonny! I'll let you have a great Pokemon, a swell Magikarp for just 500 P!

Red pauses, thinking, then nods.

Shady Man  
Great! You've made the deal of a lifetime! Here you go!

Red gives the man 500 P and the man shoves the pokeball at him.

Shady Man  
Thanks! Now it's yours forever! No refunds!

The shady man flees. Red got a Magikarp!

Red  
...

Magikarp  
(...)

Nickie  
(Doesn't look like a great Pokemon to me. What a rip-off!)

Rowina  
(Shush, he can hear you.)

Magikarp  
(...)

Nickie  
(You think? Doesn't look like it understands anything that's going on.)

Rowina  
(He's still a Pokemon like you and me.)

Magikarp  
(...Gyaaaa...)

Rowina  
(Gyaa? Speak up, kiddo.)

Magikarp  
(...dooo...)

Nickie  
(He's speaking gibberish. I think we got a mental case here.)

Red  
...Gyadon.

Pika  
(Is that a name?)

Red gives a thumbs-up to Gyadon the Magikarp.

Pika  
(That's a yes.) 

Rowina  
(Well, there you have it. Gyadon here is going to be a part of our team, so we'd better treat him like it.)

Nickie  
(You're bossy for being a newcomer.)

Pika  
(Nickie, don't incite her, please. We're a team.)

Nickie  
(Fine, fine. But she's only above the fish in terms of pecking order.)

Rowina  
(If it's pecking, then I'm number one. And call him by his name.)

Nickie  
(I'll call him by his name when he's worth it. There's only room for six Pokemon in a trainer's team, so we don't need anyone who's useless.)

Rowina  
(You haven't even seen him in battle yet. And if he's got no talent, then I'll coach it out of him.)

Nickie  
(You? You've got nothing, you said it yourself.)

Rowina  
(Tough words from one who would've been Spearow food if it weren't for me.)

Nickie  
(So you claim.)

Pika  
(Stop it, you two! Look, Red's getting something to eat, so we're eating too! No arguing over dinner!)

Red walks over to the second counter of the Pokemon Center, which isn't a Link Cable Club because what the hell is a Link Cable and how would you trade Pokemon with it? No, the second counter is a food court. A Pokemon Center has to get it's money from somewhere!

Waitress  
What'll you have?

Red looks at the menu on the wall, and calls out his Pokemon to see it too.

Rowina  
(Jigglyburger? I hope that's made out of real Jigglypuffs, I've never eaten any of those.)

Nickie  
(I'll take that too!)

Pika  
(Rawst Berry Salad? Salad and berries, together at last? I have to try that!)

Rowina  
(What'll you have, Gyadon?)

Gyadon  
(...foooood...)

Rowina  
(Yeah, food. What kind of food?)

Gyadon  
(...)

Rowina  
(...What do fish eat?)

Pika  
(Uhh. Worms?)

Rowina  
(Worms, worms... Ooh, the Pokemons' Menu has mashed Caterpie. How about that?)

Gyadon  
(...gooood...)

Waitress  
Have you decided yet?

Red nods and points at the meals on the list.

Waitress  
So that's a Children's Meal, two Jigglyburgers, a Rawst Berry Salad, and a Mashed Caterpie?

Red nods, and the waitress gives the order to the chef. As Red and his Pokemon get ready to eat, we exit the Pokemon Center and look over the route he just passed. Mt. Moon rises high above the Center, and people trip over Geodudes near it and get pummeled by rocky fists. A little further away, in a grassfield, a Jigglypuff is done devouring the carcass of a Rattata, spitting out a bone. It makes a happy noise of contentment after it's meal, but this short moment of carelessness has a high price, as an Oddish appears from behind it, and with a little slash of a razor-sharp leaf, the hunter is dead. The Oddish devours it whole, leaving behind nothing, and keeps walking with a smile. This is Route 3. On to the Moon!


	11. Mt. Moon - Prepare for Trouble

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red meets Team Rocket, a nerd, and... Team Rocket.

The place: Mt. Moon. It may or may not be a beautiful day, as we can't see the weather from inside the cave. Paras scuttle around, planting their mushrooms on everything. A sleeping Clefairy ends up with a parasitic mushroom sapping its life. Some men dressed in black scout the area, ignoring even the rare Clefairy in their search for something much more worthwhile. Not too far away, Red has two of his Pokemon out, facing a Zubat.

Rowina  
(Gyadon, keep an eye on me.)

Rowina used Peck! Wild Zubat was hurt!

Rowina  
(Like that. It's easy. Now you try!)

Gyadon used Splash! But nothing happened!

Rowina  
(...Good effort. But try just a little more.)

Nickie  
(Geez, are you still trying? Give up, it's a waste of time.)

Rowina  
(Nope. Seeing combat will give him experience. He'll figure it out eventually.)

Nickie  
(If you say so. I'll just curl up and take a nap. Wake me up when you're done.)

Red keeps walking through the cave, and has Rowina and Gyadon fight every wild Pokemon they meet. Eventually, they pass by a gaggle of men in black talking.

Rocket 1  
Did you find those fossils yet?

Rocket 2  
I hear some nerd got hold of them.

Rocket 1  
A nerd? Then this'll be easy! Let's take his lunch money!

Rocket 3  
We haven't found that nerd yet, though.

Rocket 1  
What are we, incompetent cartoon villains? We're Team Rocket, the criminal organization! We strike fear with our strength!

Rocket 4  
What are we standing around talking for when we should be looking for the fossils? At this rate, THEY'll find them before us!

Rocket 1  
Ugh. Let's go, team! Get those fossils before those three!

The Rockets run off, ignoring Red, who ignores them.

Pika  
(Who were those people?)

Rowina  
(A gang of some sort, I'd guess. Let's keep walking.)

So Red keeps walking. Eventually...

Nerd  
Stop right there!

Red stops right there.

Nerd  
I am a Super Nerd! You see these fossils?

Red nods.

Super Nerd  
You want these fossils?

Red shakes his head.

Super Nerd  
You want these fossils!?

Red shakes his head.

Super Nerd  
You can't have them!

Red nods.

Super Nerd  
Let's battle.

Red  
?!

Super Nerd  
Go, Gootrude!

Gootrude the Grimer  
(Salutations and greetings!)

Red  
Rowina, Gyadon.

Rowina  
(Gyadon, watch me.)

Super Nerd  
Using two Pokemon against one? That's against the rules! ...Oh wait it's a Magikarp, go ahead.

Rowina  
(Tch.)

Gootrude  
(You'll ooze!)

Rowina  
(What? ...You mean "lose?")

Gootrude used Pound! Rowina used Fury Attack! Attacked three times!

Gootrude  
(Oof! Hmm. Ain't it roode to sit back while your buddy's fighting?)

Gootrude used Pound on Gyadon!

Rowina  
(Hey! Cut that out, you slimy bastard!)

Gyadon  
(...)

Gyadon used Tackle!

Gootrude  
(Oof! What the hey?)

Rowina  
(Gyadon... That's it! You did it! Now keep it up!)

Rowina used Peck! Gyadon used Tackle! Gootrude fainted!

Rowina  
(That's it! That was great!)

Gyadon  
(...ha...)

Super Nerd  
What the crap! Did a Magikarp just beat up my Grimer? You know what, that's it. I'm done. Take one of these fossils and get out.

Red  
?

Red hesitantly takes one of the fossils.

Super Nerd  
And I'll be keeping the other one! Yoink!

Red got the Helix Fossil! Super Nerd runs off with the other fossil! Which begs the question why he didn't just do that before. Red puts the fossil in his bag and starts walking again.

Woman's voice  
Hold it! You're not going anywhere!

Man's voice  
You couldn't have forgotten this is based on Yellow Version, could you?

Catlike voice  
And ya got somethin' we want, an' when Team Rocket wants somethin' we get it!

Two jokers and a Meowth appear before Red. Yes, it's THEM.

Jessie  
It's our first appearance, James! Let's make sure it's one they don't forget!

James  
You've got it, Jessie! Who says you can't mix anime with games?

Meowth  
Whoever it is, dey obviously didn't know about us!

Jessie  
Our adoring fans have been waiting for this! That's right, it's time to... Prepare for trouble!

James  
And make it double!

Jessie  
To protect the world from devastation!

James  
To defend the people within our nation!

Jessie  
To denounce the evils of truth and love!

James  
To extend our reach to the stars above!

Jessie  
JESSIE!

James  
JAMES!

Both  
Team Rocket!

Jessie  
Blasting off with the speed of light!

James  
Surrender now, or prepare to fight!

Meowth  
Meowth, dat's right!

The trio poses.

Jessie  
Ah, it feels good to break out the good ol' motto every once in a while!

James  
And to a new twerp, even! Variety is the spice of life, as I always say!

Meowth  
Would ya two idiots shuddup? We've got a problem!

James  
A problem? What is it?

Meowth  
Dat twerp ran off while we were doin' da motto!

Jessie  
WHAT? Why didn't you say anything if you saw it?

Meowth  
And interrupt da motto? No way!

James  
He has a point.

Jessie  
...Ah, well. Who cares about some musty old fossils?

James  
The Boss does.

Jessie  
Don't remind me! Well... I think I saw a sleeping Clefairy nearby. Let's take that to the Boss and he's sure to forgive us!

Meowth  
Dat twerp took da Clefairy too.

Jessie  
...And you let that happen too?!

Meowth  
In da name of da motto.

James  
How about we catch that twerp's Pikachu and give that to the Boss?

Jessie  
Are you an idiot? The Boss isn't going to care about any old Pikachu! He loves strong Pokemon!

James  
Right...

Jessie  
Now, that Magikarp, on the other hand...

James  
That's brilliant, Jessie! Once we catch that super-powerful Magikarp...

Meowth  
Da Boss'll love it! He'll see dat Magikarp and say "Dat'll be da best swimming partner ever!" And den he'll strip naked and go skinny-dippin' wid dat Magikarp, and I'll be dere to watch it, and den he'll say to me "Meowth, you and your team sure did well to bring me dis Magikarp, so I'll shower you with riches!"

James  
Oh Meowth, your crazy Boss fantasies are starting to get more and more blatant every time!

Jessie  
But as long as they end with us being rich and glamorous, it's all good! Team Rocket, away!

And then Team Rocket walks off at a leisurely pace.

James  
Isn't it nice not to blast off? I think we should appear in more game-based fics.

Jessie  
It's a nice change of pace.

Meowth  
We'll be back, folks!

Meanwhile, outside the cave, on Route 4, Red is exiting the Mt. Moon Cave, carrying a sickly Clefairy with him.

Clefairy  
*cough, cough*

Rowina  
(Good thing we found that one. He probably wouldn't survive on his own.)

Pika  
(What's wrong with him?)

Rowina  
(Cordyceps infection. A Paras mushroom is growing on him. I've seen some Pokemon near the Mt. Moon die of that.)

Pika  
(Eww! Will he be okay if we take him to a Pokemon Center?)

Rowina  
(I don't know. Hopefully.)

Nickie  
(Who were those weird guys shouting rhymes? They woke me up.)

Pika  
(Who cares, we've got a sick Clefairy to worry about! Let's hurry to that city right away!)

Clefairy  
(T... thank you...) *cough*

As Red hurries to Celadon City, we look up, at the tall mountain behind him. Somewhere inside it, countless trainers are annoyed by being swarmed by Zubats at every turn, some Rockets are about to be very disappointed and annoyed, while other Rockets are preparing for their next cameo appearance. This is Mt. Moon. Where Clefairys Sing and Dance.


	12. Cerulean City - Buncha Kids With Colorful Names

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red meets a girl named Blue and has a rematch with Green.

The place: Cerulean City. It's a beautiful day, but then again, any day would be after a long trek through a cave. Red can be seen jumping down a ledge to get to Cerulean, a sickly Clefairy in his arms. He looks around, looking for the Pokemon Center. A girl notices him.

Girl  
Hey, you! Is that a Clefairy?

Red nods, looking out of breath.

Girl  
Let me see! I love Clefairys! ...Ah! Is it sick?

Red nods.

Red  
Center...

Girl  
It's this way! Come on, follow me! Hurry!

Red follows the girl while that familiar music plays. You know the one. They arrive to the Pokemon Center.

Girl  
Nurse!! Emergency here!

Nurse  
Hm? Let me see... Oh dear, cordyceps infestation. I'll do my best.

The nurse takes the Clefairy to the back room. Red and the girl sit down on the couch.

Girl  
...I hope your Clefairy will be okay.

Red  
Not mine.

Girl  
What? Is it wild, then? And you helped it anyway?

Red nods.

Girl  
...Cool. I'm Blue.

Red  
Red.

Blue  
What, seriously?

Red nods.

Blue  
Is naming kids after colors a thing or what? But anyway... If- No, when that Clefairy gets better...

Red  
?

Blue  
Can I have it?

Red nods.

Blue  
Awesome! You're pretty cool, Red.

Red  
?

Nickie  
(Awww, is this romance?)

Pika  
(No... No, I don't think so.)

Rowina  
(Yeah, staring blankly at somebody isn't really "romance.")

Minutes pass.

Some Guy  
Bill has many Pokemon!

Some Other Guy  
Bill even has rare Pokemon!

Some Third Guy  
Bill is called a Pokemaniac!

Blue  
I see the Bill fanclub is hanging out here again...

Red and Blue spend some time sitting there, listening to basic facts about a guy called Bill, until finally, the nurse comes out. Blue stands up.

Blue  
Will it be okay?

Nurse  
He's going to survive. The worst has passed.

Blue  
Oh, thank Articuno, Zapdos and Moltres!

Red gets up and hands the nurse his Pokemon.

Nurse  
Oh, your other Pokemon? Right away, sir!

The nurse heals Red's Pokemon and hands them back. Red nods at Blue and begins to leave.

Blue  
W-wait! I, uh... do you have a bike?

Red shakes his head.

Blue  
If you ever want one, come over to Miracle Cycle, okay? My dad owns it, and I'll tell him to give you a discount, as thanks, you know? It'll still probably be a small fortune, but... that's all I can do.

Red  
Thanks.

Red leaves.

Nickie  
(Hey! Go back! You had a nice mood going!)

Rowina  
(I'm telling you, that wasn't "romance"!)

Nickie  
(She's totally into him, you can see it!)

Rowina  
(Maybe, but you can also see he's not interested in the least.)

Nickie  
(How can you tell? This guy doesn't show his feelings on the outside, like, ever. If he had a crush, I bet he'd be the same as ever!)

Rowina  
(Why are you so interested in his love life, anyway? Projecting, much?)

Nickie  
(We're going to be hanging with this guy for a while. His love life will be a part of our life, too.)

Rowina  
(Well, that's true. ...Huh. Wait, am I going to be this kid's Pokemon for the rest of my life?)

Pika  
(Or until he releases you.)

Rowina  
(Huh. I'm... not sure how I feel about this, actually. He's a nice enough guy, sure, but...)

Nickie  
(I've seen worse trainers.)

Suddenly Green! He notices Red and begins to wave at him.

Green  
HEY! Red! Red, over here! REEEDD!

Nickie  
(Case in point.)

Rowina  
(Yeah, looking at this kid, I feel better about this whole thing.)

Red nods to Green.

Green  
Hey! Did you catch new Pokemon? I did! And he evolved! Twice! My Pokemon are the smartest and strongest! What about yours?? Did they get stronger? Did they get smarter?? Huh? Huh???

Red  
...

Green  
Battle me!

Red nods.

Green  
YES! Go, Minnie!

Red  
Gyadon.

The Pokemon are sent out!

Green  
Wow! That's a new Pokemon! I've never seen it before! I bet it's AWESOME! But not as great as mine!

Minamo  
(...)

Gyadon  
(...)

Red  
...Return. Go, Pika.

Green  
What?! Why'd you do that? Can you do that? Is that allowed? Are you cheating??

Red nods twice, then shakes his head.

Green  
Oh, okay. Minnie, Bubble!

Minamo  
(Wow, my only move, what a surprise...) *blows bubbles*

Pika  
*gets bubbles popped at* (Well, um, I hope you won't hold this against me, but... I don't think this'll take long.)

Minamo  
(I know.)

Pika  
(Well... it was nice to talk to you!) *Thundershock*

Minamo  
(Grzzzzh!! ...same...) *faints*

Green  
Argh! That was totally cheating! It so was!

Red  
...

Green  
Back, Minnie! Go, Zach!

Zachary  
(Hello again! Pika, wasn't it?)

Pika  
(Yeah, and you're Zach?)

Zachary  
(Zachary, actually... Well, not that it matters. I hope our battle won't be as short as last time.)

Pika  
(Same here. Well, enough pleasantries, I think the girls back there are getting impatient.)

Nickie  
(I want to see blood!)

Pika  
(...That's how it is.)

Zachary  
(Oh, I'll be glad to indulge a lady. Quick Attack!)

Pika  
(Guh! Ow! Not pulling any punches, are you?)

Zachary  
(I find myself more motivated when there are ladies present.)

Pika  
(Even if you're the one fighting them?) *Thundershock*

Zachary  
(Gzzt-! W-why, are you implying something about yourself? Quick Attack!)

Pika  
(Ow... No, just saying that if you take me down, one of them will be your next opponent.) *Thundershock*

Zachary  
(Gh-! Ugh... Well... No danger of that, it seems. Corey... do your thing.) *faints*

Corey  
(Senpai, nooo!)

Pika  
(...Okay.)

Green  
Augh! Red, your Pokemon is so strong! But now you're gonna face my strongest Pokemon! Nobody's beaten him since he evolved! Go, Corey!

Corey the Butterfree  
(I'll avenge my friends!)

Pika  
(Avenge? They're not dead, you know...)

Corey  
(Semantics, schemantics. Confusion!)

Pika  
(Wha- whoa... w-why's the world spinning?)

Corey  
(Shh. That's normal. Just go to sleep, you're tired.)

Pika  
(Oh, am I... No! I've got to fight! Uh... Where... Ow!)

Pika's confused! Pika hurt itself in confusion! Pika fainted!

Green  
Ha! See? That's Corey's special move! Nobody can beat him!

Red  
...Back. Rowina.

Rowina  
(All right, guess it's up to me.)

Corey  
(I'll defeat all of you! No matter how many of you there are, I won't lose!)

Rowina  
(Hey, random question. Do you like your trainer?)

Corey  
(Huh? Well, yeah! Why?)

Rowina  
(That was going to be my next question, actually.) *Fury Attack*

Corey  
(Ow! Well, I... Ow again! Why do I like my trainer? He's fun! He's so proud of us all and encourages us to grow! When I evolved, it was like he was the happiest little guy in the world. He really loves us. What about you? Your trainer seems like a grump. Confusion!)

Rowina  
(Ow! What...) *shakes head* (He's quiet, sure, but he's a good person, and a competent trainer.)

Corey  
(He sounds like a bore.)

Rowina  
(Who cares? Earlier today, he picked up a dying wild Pokemon, brought it to the Pokemon Center, and stayed until it got better, then left. He's the kind of guy I'd rely on with my life. Unlike yours.) *fury attack*

Corey  
(Ow! Way to- Ow! -Be rude! Ow! Oww! I guess your trainer's cool, but I'm happy with mine!)

Rowina  
(So we're both happy.)

Corey  
(Yep. Confusion!)

Rowina  
(Bwah! Oof... Tch. Hate to say this, but... I'm out. Nickie... Don't screw up.) *faints*

Green  
Yes! Corey, you're the BEST!

Corey  
(No, you're the best, Green!)

Red  
Back. ... ... ...Gyadon.

Nickie  
(Huh?)

Green  
We meet again, mystery fish!

Gyadon  
(Gyaa...)

Corey  
(Um...)

Gyadon  
*tackle*

Corey  
(Gaah! Ugh... I... didn't know I was so low on health...) *faints*

Green  
Waugh! Corey, return! Wow! Your mystery fish is super strong! But I'll catch a Pokemon that's just as strong!

Nickie  
(Ha! Just try it!)

Green  
But guess what! I went to see Bill! He's famous and knows a lot about Pokemon and sciences! But he wasn't there. But there was a weird talking Pokemon I'd never seen before! It was so cool! But anyway, I'm gonna catch a cool and strong and rare Pokemon. Smell you later!

Green begins to walk away, then turns back.

Green  
Get it? Because you smell and I'm leaving? Do you get it?

Red nods.

Green  
Yes! I'm so great at catchphrases!

Green walks off to the city. Red keeps walking on.

Boy  
This is the Nugget Bridge! Beat us 5 trainers and win a fabulous prize!

Red turns around and walks away.

Boy  
Um... fabulous prize? Hello? Aww...

As Red heads towards the Pokemon Center, we zoom out to see the entirety of Cerulean City. Isn't it beautiful? Just look at the river passing the city, and the quaint Nugget Bridge. On the end of the bridge, a man in black looks to the distance, at the mysterious cavern by the bridge. A man stands guard in front of the cave entrance, shaking in fear of the power pulsing through the rock walls. This is Cerulean City. A Mysterious Blue Aura Surrounds It.

* * *

_Image description: A picture of Blue, who resembles the original cut female protagonist from the Gen 1 games._


	13. Route 24 - Nuggets of Experience

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red battles a member of Team Rocket at Nugget Bridge.

The place: Nugget Bridge. It's a beautiful day. On a grassy patch near the river, Oddishes are skulking about on their Oddish business. Down the river, at the bridge, we meet our old pal Red, calling his Pokemon back after a battle.

Jr. Trainer  
I did my best, I have no regrets!

Red nods to him and walks past him, crossing the bridge.

Nickie  
(All right, that was number 5! Now where do we get that fabulous prize?)

A young man dressed in black approaches Red.

Man  
Congratulations! You beat our contest trainers! You just earned... Hey, wait a sec...

The man looks at Red, brows furrowed.

Man  
This might be a stupid question, but are you from Pallet Town?

Red nods.

Man  
I knew it! You're that quiet kid who was always dragged around by Daisy's little bro! I just met him earlier. You probably don't remember me... I'm Fire, a friend of Daisy's.

Red  
Red.

Fire  
Red, right! Heh, it's sure been a while since I went back home. You were like, what, five back then. Well, anyway... You've earned a fabulous prize!

Fire takes out a gold nugget.

Fire  
Ta-dah. It's pure gold.

Red grabs it and stuffs it in his bag.

Fire  
Well... you're a pretty good trainer. Do you want to join our group?

Nickie  
(Uh-oh! That's a warning sign.)

Fire  
We're called Team Rocket. Basically, we use Pokemon to make money.

Pika  
(He's with the guys in Mt. Moon!)

Rowina  
(...The ones with the rhymes?)

Pika  
(...Uh, yes, but also the shady guys talking about stealing. I'm pretty sure this guy's bad news.)

Red  
...

Fire  
If you don't want to join, just say so. In fact, you're probably better off that way.

Red  
...Gyadon.

Gyadon  
(Gyaaa...)

Fire  
...Hm?

Red  
...

Gyadon  
(...)

Fire  
...

Red  
Battle.

Fire  
What? Oh, no kid, you don't want to fight me.

Red  
...

Gyadon  
(...)

Fire  
Seriously. I'd destroy you.

Nickie  
(Coward! Fight us! We can take you on! We can take ANYONE on!)

Pika  
(I'm not really confident about this...)

Nickie  
(Pfft, we've defeated everyone thus far. Even Brock and his rocks. We can do this!)

Red  
...

Fire  
... *sigh* Don't say I didn't warn you. Jessica, stand by.

Jessica the Blastoise  
(I'm ready! But... Really? A Magikarp?)

Pika  
(Feeling less and less confident!)

Nickie  
(We'll be fine! She's smaller than an Onix, isn't she? And I just evolved, too! We can do this!)

Jessica  
(Ahh, kids. Kids who've won a few times and think they own the world. It's always a sad day, when we have to teach them it's not true.)

Red  
Gyadon, return. Pika.

Pika  
(Oh no. Oh no. Oh crap, oh no.)

Nickie  
(Calm down! She's obviously a water-type, you've got the advantage!)

Pika  
(Right. Okay. *Thundershock!*)

Jessica  
(...)

Pika  
(...)

Jessica  
(No hard feelings. *Surf*)

Pika  
(GAAAHBLUBLUblu...) *faints*

Nickie  
(...)

Rowina  
(Still enthused?)

Nickie  
(...I'll be fine! I'm a Nidorina!)

Rowina  
(Uh-huh.)

Red  
...Rowina.

Rowina  
(Well, then.)

Fire  
Look, kid, we don't have to do this. You can leave anytime you want.

Red  
No. Can't run from trainer battles.

Fire  
All right. Jessica...

Jessica  
*Surfs!*

Rowina  
(Ghhh...) *faints*

Gyadon  
(Gyaaa...!)

Nickie  
(Calm down! I can do this! I'll avenge her!)

Red  
...Nickie.

Nickie  
(All right, you asshole! Let's do this! DOUBLE KIIICK!)

Jessica  
(Ouch! Oh, that almost hurt!)

Nickie  
(Rrrgh...! Double! Kick! Double! Kiick!)

Jessica  
*Surf!*

Nickie  
(Aaaaugh!)

Red  
...!

Fire  
I warned you, you know.

Red  
... ... ...G...Gyadon.

Gyadon  
(...Ev... ry... one...)

Jessica  
*Surfs*

Gyadon  
(...)

Red  
...!

Fire  
That was the last one, wasn't it?

Red's out of usable Pokemon! Red blacked out!

Fire  
H-hey!

Fire rushes to catch Red before he falls.

Fire  
Kid! You okay? ...He's breathing. Doesn't seem ill, either... Geez. That must've been a shock to him. He's never lost a battle before, I bet.

Jessica  
(Poor kid.)

Fire  
Jessica, return. Leene, stand by.

Leene the Arcanine  
(Ooh! What're we doing? What're we doing?)

Fire sets Red on Leene's back.

Fire  
Go take him to the Pokemon Center. Oh, hold on...

Fire searches Red's pockets and grabs some cash.

Fire  
There we go. Now, go to the Pokemon Center in Cerulean. Make sure he doesn't fall off your back, and that the nurse sees him and heals his Pokemon. Then return here.

Leene  
(I will do this!)

Leene runs off. Soon, she arrives in the Pokemon Center.

Leene  
*barks*

Blue  
Wha- RED! Oh my gosh, is he okay? Are you one of his Pokemon?

Leene  
*shakes head*

Blue  
Oh... He doesn't look like he's hurt... Thanks for bringing him here.

Leene  
(I'm a good girl!)

Blue  
Nurse! Could you take a look at him?

Nurse  
Hm? Oh- oh my! Let's take him to the couch.

Blue and the nurse do so, and the nurse examines him.

Blue  
*fidgeting* What happened to him? Is he gonna be okay?

Leene  
(Jessica beat his Pokemon! Fire stole his cash! I brought him here! We did well!)

Nurse  
Hm... it looks like he's just fainted. That often happens to trainers who lose a battle.

Blue  
So he's okay? Oh, phew...

Leene  
*nudges Red's Pokeballs* (Nurse lady! Heal his Pokemon, so I can go back!)

Nurse  
Ah, yes. I'll go ahead and heal those.

The nurse takes Red's Pokemon.

Leene  
(Hooray! I've done my mission! I'm a good girl!)

Leene runs out of the doors.

Blue  
Bye, doggy tiger Pokemon! Thank you!

Blue sits down on the bench next to Red.

Blue  
Geez... Don't scare me like that, Red.

Ding-ding-di-di-ding! Red's Pokemon are fully healed!

Nickie  
(...Gwah?! Wh-where... Oh...)

Pika  
(...Pokemon center... We lost, didn't we?)

Gyadon  
(Gyaaa...)

Rowina  
(Thought so.)

Nickie  
(...Dammit!)

The nurse brings the Pokeballs to the bench.

Nurse  
I'll leave these here. Give them to him when he's woken up.

Blue  
Thank you.

Pika  
(Red! What happened?)

Rowina  
(Oh, he just fainted. I've seen that happen to trainers. He'll wake up in a while.)

Pika  
(Oh...)

Nickie  
(...Why couldn't I defeat her?)

Rowina  
(Because we're weak.)

Nickie  
(Shut up!)

Rowina  
(It's the truth. That guy, Fire, has been a trainer since ours was just a little guy. We met Red not too long ago, traveled together for a little while, defeated a few trainers. It's been less than a day for me. Fire's had hundreds of days like today. We were outclassed, plain and simple.)

Nickie  
(...Tch. I hate it when you're sensible.)

Pika  
(So it was impossible to win...)

Rowina  
(Exactly. That's why we shouldn't feel down. We couldn't have won the way we are now.)

Nickie  
(How is that supposed to make us feel better?!)

Rowina  
(Because this is the best way it could've ended. A loss was inevitable, but we're alive, safe, and together.)

Nickie  
(Oh, sure. We're not DEAD, so everything's FINE. Okay then.)

Rowina  
(...Be like that, then.)

Gyadon  
(Ro...)

Rowina  
(Yes?)

Gyadon  
(We... weak...?)

Rowina  
(We can become stronger.)

Gyadon  
(Trai...nnii..)

Rowina  
(Yeah. Want to go train with me right now?)

Gyadon  
(Yeee...)

Rowina comes out of her Pokeball.

Rowina  
(Let's go, then.)

Gyadon's pokeball wiggles a bit, then he manages to break out of it.

Gyadon  
(Go...)

Pika  
(Wait!)

Pika comes out too.

Pika  
(Where are you going? Red's still sleeping!)

Rowina  
(We're going out for a while. Be back later.)

Pika  
(But...)

Rowina  
(You stay here, keep an eye on him.)

Pika  
(But why are you going? Why now?!)

Rowina  
(Because we want to become stronger. We can't just sit around right now. Especially Gyadon. He wants to shrug that loss off, so to say.)

Gyadon  
(Ssst...ron...)

Rowina  
(Yeah. We're going to get strong. Make sure Red doesn't leave without us, okay?)

Pika  
(...Okay.)

Gyadon jumps on Rowina's back, and she walks out, taking flight once she's outside.

Blue  
Ummm... What's going on? Where are they going? I wish I understood Pokemon language...

Pika  
(Don't worry about it... I think...)

Blue  
I guess they're Red's Pokemon, so they do things in their own way...

Nickie  
(...Hey, Pika.)

Pika  
(Hm?)

Nickie  
(You think they'll come back?)

Pika  
(Of- Of course they'll come back! She said they would! Right?)

Nickie  
(Yeah, but she's always saying stuff like "are we gonna be with Red forever" and so on... Maybe she decided to split.)

Pika  
(No way! I trust her! She's one of us... She'll definitely return!)

Nickie  
(...Whatever. I'm... I think I'll take a nap. I need one.)

Pika  
*sigh* (...Yeah. Today's been tough.)

As Red sleeps, Pika keeps watching the door, an uncertain atmosphere in the air. With that we pan out, out of the Pokemon Center, and view the surroundings. Green, his hands in his pockets, walks around town with an uncharacteristically slow pace, looking down. He doesn't see Rowina, Gyadon in tow, flying above him towards Route 24, crossing the river. On the bridge nearby, we can see Leene the Arcanine greet her trainer enthusiastically. Fire pets her, then recalls her into a Pokeball and sighs. This is Route 24. Something scuttles in the grass...

* * *

_Image description: Fire, tossing a pokeball, standing in front of a sunset. The sunset is just there for aesthetics though, I don't think it's that late in the fic? Idk it looked good okay_


	14. Route 24 ~ Crossroads of Lives ~ Cerulean City

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rowina and Gyadon meet new friends while training. Green finds a home of abandoned Pokemon. Red and his team gather themselves.

The place: a grassy patch on Route 24. It's a slightly cloudy, but beautiful day. An Oddish, ever smiling, totters through the grass, looking for unsuspecting prey. Nearby, a pair of Pokemon - a Charmander and a Bulbasaur - watch it from a hiding place.

Charmander  
*whispering* (I totally could beat it.)

Bulbasaur  
*whispering* (You could not.)

Charmander  
*whispering* (Could too. I have the type advantage. Fire versus Grass, Daniel. Fire versus Grass.)

Daniel the Bulbasaur  
*whispering* (You don't know any fire moves, Diego.)

Diego the Charmander  
*flushes* (Well- Anyway! It's just an Oddish, what's it gonna do, absorb? I can take it on.)

Daniel  
*sigh* (Fine, if you- whoa!)

Diego  
(Whoa?)

The Oddish stands before them, watching them with a vacant smile.

Diego  
(Whoa! W-well, okay, let's do this!)

Diego uses Scratch! The Oddish shrugs it off, it's smile never faltering.

Diego  
(What? No reaction? Are you serious!?)

Daniel  
(Um, Diego... W-what level do you think this guy is...)

Diego  
(...Erm...)

The Oddish uses Cut!

Diego  
(Wha-ARGH!)

Daniel  
(Diego!)

It's fairly effective! Diego clutches his bleeding arm, inching closer to Daniel, keeping his eyes on the Oddish.

Diego  
(Daniel...)

Daniel  
(A-are you okay?)

Diego  
(Run.)

Daniel  
(N-no.)

Diego  
(Just go, you'd just get in the way. I can take this guy out without your useless onion butt.)

Daniel  
(I said n-no. You're n-not getting rid of me by trying to get me angry. I'm h-helping you!)

Daniel uses Leech Seed! The Oddish is seeded!

Diego  
(Dammit, Daniel... What if we both die? What then?)

Diego  
(Then we'll h-haunt everybody together, I guess.)

Diego  
(...Heh. Guess that's the plan then.)

Diego and Daniel face the Oddish bravely. The Oddish smiles as Daniel's Leech Seed sucks its life force.

The standoff continues. The Oddish shows no sign of emotion in it's smile. Blood drips from Diego's wound. Daniel gets ready to move, sweat dripping from his brow...

SUDDENLY A MAGIKARP FALLS FROM THE SKY AND TACKLES THE ODDISH. The Oddish falls down!

Diego and Daniel  
?!

Rowina  
(Good job, Gyadon!)

Rowina flies down and uses Peck! It's super effective!

The Oddish faints!

Rowina  
(There we go. You're getting better every battle.)

Gyadon  
(...Soon...)

Rowina  
(Yeah, you're gonna be a full fledged warrior soon. ...Hm?

Rowina notices the two other Pokemon present.

Rowina  
(Oh, sorry, were you guys fighting this one? My bad.)

Daniel  
(N-no, we... um...)

Diego  
(Yeah, we had it in the bag, we were totally just about to-)

Daniel headbutts him.

Diego  
(-Ow! Okay, fine, to be honest...)

Diego gets on his knees and bows to Rowina.

Diego  
(You saved our lives! Thank you so much! How can we repay you?)

Daniel  
*facepalm* (Diego, reel it in a little...)

Diego  
(No, this is how I really feel. I'm not taking it back.)

Rowina  
*blinks* (Uh, you don't need to pay me back or anything. I'm just training Gyadon here. We weren't trying to save you, it just happened by coincidence.)

Diego  
*looks up* (You're training him? Then train me too!)

Daniel  
(Diego?! Come on, don't just ask things like that suddenly...)

Diego  
(It's not sudden. I want to get stronger, Daniel. I always have. And this lady's really awesome and strong! I want to be like that, too!)

Rowina  
(...)

Daniel  
(Don't say that... You can't just ask somebody you just met to train you. You'll just bother her! And you're still bleeding, too... You're way too reckless!)

Diego  
(That's me, yeah. *licks his wound* I like fighting, so...)

Daniel  
(You... stupid... *grumble, grumble* You just want to become stronger so you can fight, huh...)

Diego  
(No, that's- I mean, yeah, that's true...)

Daniel  
*surprised* (That's... a lie?)

Diego  
(Guh! Erm...)

Daniel  
(I can tell! Tell me the truth! Diego!)

Diego  
(I... want to protect you... but I'm too weak... so...)

Daniel  
*blinks, surprised*

Diego  
(So... So! You're reckless too! Even when I try to protect you, you insist on protecting me, too! Because I'm too weak to help you! So I'll get strong enough that you can rely on me!)

Daniel  
(Diego... That's... a sweet sentiment but I don't really want to be protected...)

Diego  
(Oh...)

Daniel  
(Don't look so sad about it... I want to protect you too! So... if you really want to become strong, then I'll train with you! We're always together, right? So let's get strong together. We'll protect each other! And fight side by side!)

Diego  
(Daniel, that's... *covers face* really embarrassing... Sheesh, how do you say that with a straight face?)

Daniel  
(Yeah... that's how I feel every time you open your mouth, basically...)

Diego  
(*still covering face* Oh man... okay... let's get strong...)

Daniel  
(Yeah... yeah, let's...)

Rowina and Gyadon watch the two, kind of amused.

Rowina  
*ahem* (So, did you two want to train with me, or...?)

Diego  
*shows his face* (Yes! I want to be your student!)

Daniel  
(Me too! If it's not too much trouble, please train us!)

Rowina  
(I'd be fine with it. But we're travelling with a trainer. His team does have two slots open. Are you two so determined you'd go with a trainer and travel all across the land with him to become strong?)

Diego and Daniel eye each other. Diego nods, and Daniel answers it.

Diego  
(Yeah! I'm ready!)

Daniel  
(Same here! I'll go anywhere with Diego!)

Rowina  
*eyes the two, then nods* (You look determined. I'll warn you, it'll be tough. We'll go where the trainer goes. We may fail, get hurt, and lose. Are you sure you're ready?)

Diego  
(Yeah!)

Daniel  
(Yes!)

Rowina  
(Welcome to the team, then. I'm Rowina, and this is Gyadon. Daniel and Diego, right?)

Diego  
(Yeah, that's us.)

Daniel  
(Nice to meet you, Rowina. Er... should we call you master Rowina?)

Rowina  
(No. For the love of the Godbirds, no. Just Rowina is fine.)

Daniel  
(Okay, Rowina. So-)

Gyadon  
(Ro...!)

Rowina  
(Hold that thought- What is it?)

Gyadon  
(Him...!)

Rowina  
(Him? *looks* Shit, him! Everybody, hide!)

Diego  
(Wha-? Okay!)

The four Pokemon hide behind grass. Soon, Fire walks by.

Fire  
Just watch, the cave's still going to be blocked... Hm?

Fire sees the Oddish, waking up from its fainted state.

Fire  
A weakened Oddish? *looks around* ...Well, finders keepers.

Fire throws a Pokeball. The Oddish is sucked inside.

Pokeball  
*Click!*

Fire picks it up, continuing on his way.

Fire  
I don't know who weakened it, but I'm not gonna say no to a free Pokemon...

Rowina and the others come out of hiding once Fire has passed.

Daniel  
(Who was that?)

Rowina  
(...A strong guy we'll defeat one day.)

Gyadon  
(Strooon... geerr...)

Rowina  
(Yeah. We'll become stronger. But right now, that guy's way out of our league.)

Diego  
(Heh. If he still has that Oddish when we fight him, we'll take our revenge, too, right?)

Daniel  
(...Yes. But, uh, I was just thinking... should we leave a message home to let everyone know we're leaving?)

Diego  
(Oh, yeah probably.)

Rowina  
(Leave a message? You can write?)

Diego  
*proudly* (I can draw letters, and Daniel can spell words! Together, we can write!)

Rowina  
(All right, go do your thing. Let's meet up at the Pokemon Center afterwards. You know where that is, right?)

Daniel  
(Yes, we've seen it.)

Diego  
(All right, see ya there!)

Diego and Daniel run off homewards.

Rowina  
(Fun kids.)

Gyadon  
(Haaah...)

Rowina  
(Heh. Wait 'til the others see we've recruited us new members.)

Gyadon  
(Heeh...)

Rowina  
(You don't sound too impressed. Are you jealous? You're still my first apprentice, you know.)

Gyadon  
(...Gnnnh...)

Meanwhile, Green is moping around.

Green  
Ahhh! Why can't I ever beat Red?! It's no fair! His Pokemon are so strong and cool! Even though my Pokemon are the best and strongest and coolest and smartest! But he always beats us! And then he's got that mystery fish that's super DUPER strong! I want a Pokemon like that too!

Coriander  
(Meh, it's not that strong...)

Green  
I need to catch new Pokemon! A Pokemon that's the BEST. And cool and cute and smart and tough and beautiful! A Pokemon like...

Diego and Daniel run by.

Green  
...that! I want a Pokemon like that! Wait up!

Green runs after them.

Daniel  
(Um! We're being followed!)

Diego  
(Yeah I hear him!)

Green  
WAIT UP COOL POKEMON

Diego  
(Just ignore him and keep running!)

Green  
YOU'RE AWesomeee...

Diego and Daniel arrive to their home, running in through a catdoor(which would actually be called a Pokemon door in this world but for convenience's sake let's call it a cat door). Green reaches the house, stops to catch his breath, and opens the door.

Green  
Hello I'm looking for awesome Pokemon!

Woman  
Oh! Welcome, you've come to the right place!

Green pauses, looking around. The house is full of Pokemon, walking or standing around. Some stare at Green.

Green  
Whoa! That's a lot of Pokemon! Where'd the ones that just ran in go?

Woman  
Oh, Diego and Daniel just came back... should I call them for you?

Green  
Are they your Pokemon?

Woman  
Mm, not really... Sorry, I should probably explain this place. This is the Lost Pokemon Station. I'm the caretaker, Catherine. This is where Pokemon that were abandoned, lost their trainers or couldn't live in the wild for whatever reason, live and are taken care of. Trainers can adopt a Pokemon to a better home from here.

Green  
Oh. What?! Why would anybody abandon a Pokemon? That's stupid! Pokemon are so great!

Catherine  
*smiles* You really love Pokemon, huh? Unfortunately, not everyone does.

Green  
Weird! So I can adopt a Pokemon here? Can I pick any of them? *looks around*

Catherine  
Well, I only allow someone to adopt a Pokemon if they themselves agree to be adopted by the trainer. So only the Pokemon that want to go with you can be chosen.

Green  
Okay! So where are those Pokemon that came in?

Catherine  
Let me see... Diego! Daniel!

Diego  
*pops his head out from behind a doorframe*

Green  
Oh! I think I know what Pokemon that is! It's a Charmander!

Catherine  
That's right. Diego, would you-

Diego  
*shakes head and goes back out of sight*

Catherine  
Oh... I'm sorry.

Green  
What about the other one?

Green follows Diego behind the doorframe.

Diego  
*holding a pen* (Okay, what's next?)

Daniel  
(Trainer... T... R... A... N... E... R...)

Diego  
*writes down* (Trraaainnn... eeerrr...)

Daniel  
(Then a period.)

Diego  
(What's a period again?)

Daniel  
(Uh... the dot.)

Diego  
(Oh. Just say dot, then.)

Green  
*points* Bulbasaur!

Daniel  
(...Yes.)

Green  
Want to come with me?

Daniel  
*shakes head*

Green  
Awww...

Catherine  
Well, them's the breaks! Do you want to see our other Pokemon?

Green  
Yeah! I always want to see Pokemon!

Catherine  
Come along, then... Here's a few now...

Green  
Oh! Who's that Pokemon?

Catherine  
That's Callisto, he's a Parasect.

Green  
And that fluffy one!

Catherine  
You mean old Poofy? He's a Venonat... behind him is another Venonat, lil' Ron...

Green  
Ahhh! He's tiny! He's so tinyyyy...

Catherine  
Isn't he cute? But he's very shy... Oh, now he's hiding.

Green  
Oh! Sorry I scared you, little guy. But you're soo cute...

Poofy  
(Ker-hem. Do back off, please...)

Catherine  
And here's Matthew-

Green  
Oh! Oh, I know what he is, Bill showed me... An Eevee! Right?

Matthew the Eevee  
(Yes, that'd be me.)

Matthew walks in between Green and Poofy. Green backs off to make room.

Matthew  
(That's better.)

Green  
Wow! You're really pretty and cute! You're an awesome Pokemon!

Matthew  
*blinks* (W-well, I mean, I am good-looking... but anyway! Hey! I see those Pokeballs. How's this guy as a trainer?)

Coriander  
(Really fun!)

Minamo  
(Yeah, he's nice. Simple, but a good kid.)

Zachary  
(He's a huge ego-boost!)

Minamo  
(...)

Zachary  
(what? It's true. He won't stop talking about how we're the best Pokemon ever. Even if we lose.)

Minamo  
(Yes... He really believes in us.)

Coriander  
(Yeah! When I'm with him I really do feel like I'm smart and cute and wonderful!)

Minamo  
*blushes* (Um... same... a bit...)

Zachary  
(Minnie's the best~ Minnie's the prettiest~ Minnie, you're sooo cool~)

Minamo  
(S-stop that!)

Matthew  
(So he's a good trainer?)

Zachary  
(Well, he's not that great at the whole winning part yet.)

Matthew  
(...A kind trainer who takes care of his Pokemon is one I'd have rather than one who wins a lot. Do you guys travel a lot?)

Minamo  
(Yes. This is the third town we've been to.)

Matthew  
(Then, I've decided.)

Matthew lifts his front leg onto Green's knee.

Green  
Huh? What? Do you want to come with me?

Matthew nods.

Green  
...Awesome! Then, then, hold on I've got a Pokeball... Here!

Matthew goes in the Pokeball.

Green  
Wow! This is so great! I got a new Pokemon and he's the best! I bet we can beat Red now! Welcome, Matt!

Matthew  
(H-huh? Matt?!)

Zachary  
(Yeah, he does that. I'm Zachary, or Zach.)

Coriander  
(I'm Coriander! Green calls me Corey, but you can call me Senpai!)

Matthew  
(I... I see. Just took me off-guard a bit... Anyway, I'm glad to be here.)

Catherine  
Wow, you really got Matthew to agree to come with you... He's always refused every trainer, before. And a lot of trainers did ask him, too...

Green  
It's because I'm the best!

Matthew  
(It's nothing that special... I'd just decided recently that I'd go with a trainer, so he had a good timing...)

Catherine  
Really... Well, isn't that nice, Matthew?

Matthew  
(...Bye, Catherine. Bye, everybody...)

Catherine  
Bye-bye, Matthew...

Diego  
(What?! Matthew's leaving too?)

Matthew  
(YOU're leaving too?! What about Daniel?)

Daniel  
(I'm going with him.)

Matthew  
(Oh, good. The thought of you two being apart is too much...)

Catherine  
Hm? Diego, you've got a message for me? Let me see...

Catherine takes the paper, which reads: "FOND A TRANER. DONT WORY ABOT US. DIEGO AN DANIL."

Catharine  
Oh my...! You two found a trainer too? Oh, I'm happy for you! But three of you leaving the same day? It's going to be a lot quieter around here...

Diego  
(Yeah, we're noisy, I got it. Adios, losers!)

Daniel  
(Diego, honestly.)

Diego  
(I mean I'm going to miss this place a lot, and everyone here, too, but I don't want to cry so I'm just gonna say bye quickly and go, okay?)

Daniel  
(Mm... I feel the same. So... BYE, EVERYBODY!)

Diego and Daniel rush out of the door.

Diego  
(Ahhh, it's not w-working, I'm c-crying anyway...!)

Daniel  
(S-same...! *sob* Just k-keep running!)

Matthew  
(Sheesh, those two...)

Green  
They got a trainer too, huh? Great! Let's hope we can meet their trainer later, huh, Matt?

Matthew  
(...Hhh... Yeah. We'll defeat them, won't we?)

Zachary  
(Heh... You bet we will!)

Outside the Pokemon Center, Rowina and Gyadon wait. Diego and Daniel run up to them.

Rowina  
(Tearful goodbye, huh?)

Diego  
*sob* (I t-tried not to...!)

Daniel  
*sniff* (L-let's try and calm down...)

Rowina  
(Take your time. We'll go meet your new trainer once you're not snot-nosed.)

Diego  
(Yeah... yeah.)

After a while, tears are dried, snot wiped, and the four enter the Pokemon Center. Pika snaps into attention immediately, running up to them.

Pika  
(Rowina! Gyadon! You're back! Of course you're back, I knew you'd be back... Nickie, I told you they'd be back!)

Nickie  
(Okay, I hear you!)

Rowina  
(Where's Red?)

Pika  
(Oh, he woke up a little bit ago, he's eating now... I was SO worried we'd leave before you came back, I wasn't sure how long you were going to take...)

Pika follows Rowina as she heads towards Red's table, suddenly noticing Diego walking next to himself.

Pika  
(...Um?)

Diego  
(Sup.)

Pika  
(Suh... up?)

Red notices Rowina, turning to face him, fork in hand.

Red  
...Rowina, Gyadon. Pika. Nickie?

Nickie  
*gets up from her nap on the sofa* (I'm listening!)

Red  
We lost. ...Sorry.

Pika  
(Oh- It's not your fault!)

Nickie  
(...Apology accepted.)

Rowina  
(We'll win next time.)

Gyadon  
(...Be'er... be... sor... ree...)

Nickie  
(Whoa, did I just hear that right? Is our fish developing some attitude? Yeah, you go!)

Gyadon  
(Heeh...)

Pika  
(Okay! Now that that's done, um, we've got some extra people here, right? You guys can all see them too, right?)

Rowina  
(Yeah, I brought them.)

Pika  
(Okay! Good.)

Red  
...?

Rowina  
(Go on.)

Diego and Daniel step up.

Diego  
(So you're Red, huh? Well, from this day on, we're joining your team! Be grateful!)

Pika  
(What?!)

Red  
...

Diego  
(Okay, let's introduce ourselves! Paper!)

Daniel  
*takes out paper stashed in his bulb* (Here!)

Diego  
(And I've got the pen! Okay, I remember how to spell these.)

Everybody watches slightly confused as Diego writes on the paper.

Diego  
(And here we go!)

Diego holds up paper that says "DIEGO DANIL".

Diego  
(I'm Diego!)

Daniel  
(And I'm Daniel!)

Diego  
(And, as said before, we're joining this team!)

Red  
...Diego... Danil?

Daniel  
(Uh, DaniEL.)

Red  
...Dani-el. ...Oh, Daniel.

Nickie  
*walks up* (Wait, really? You're joining us?)

Diego  
(Yeah! We're going to become strong and travel the world!)

Daniel  
(I hope you won't mind us.)

Nickie  
(...Well, I mean, more teammates can't be bad... Yeah, if you won't get in the way, I guess that's fine.)

Pika  
(I'm- I'm touched, honestly! I don't quite understand why, but that's good! Oh, and here I was worried we'd lose Rowina and Gyadon, but then they just brought us new people... Feels like a new hope! Erm, not to pressure you or anything, eheh...)

Diego  
(Hey man, don't be nervous, we're teammates now!)

Pika  
(Oh, erm, thank you but I'm afraid I'm always a bit nervous... Oh, but we ahould make it official! Red! Pokeballs!)

Red  
...! *takes out two Pokeballs*

Diego  
(All right, I know how this works, hand it over!)

Diego and Daniel take the Pokeballs and go in. Red caught (?) a Bulbasaur and a Charmander! Red takes their Pokeballs and calls them back out.

Red  
Welcome, Diego, Daniel.

Pika  
(Yes, welcome to the team! We're surprised and glad to have you here!)

Gyadon  
(Wel... com...)

Red  
Now... *takes some menus and hands them out* Order. Let's eat.

Nickie  
(Oh now that's what I'm talking about! Grubtime!)

Pika  
(I was too nervous to eat before, but now that I think about it I really am hungry!)

Gyadon  
(Wooormss...)

Daniel  
(Wait, we can order anything? Is that okay? Who's paying?)

Rowina  
(Red's paying, of course. Oh, by the way, Diego.)

Diego  
(Yeah, what is it?)

Rowina  
(After you've ordered, let's take you to get healed.)

Diego  
(Oh. *looks at his arm* Oh, right, after it stopped bleeding I totally forgot about that.)

Daniel  
*horrified* (I can't believe I forgot too... Doesn't it hurt? Are you okay?)

Diego  
(I'm fine! Come on, don't start fussing over me. Let's eat!)

Daniel  
(Okay, but you have to promise to get healed as Rowina said, all right?)

Diego  
(I promise.)

The two start looking at the menu, while Nickie nudges Rowina.

Rowina  
(?)

Nickie  
(So... are they like in loooove?)

Rowina  
*sigh*

As the Pokemon make their orders, we draw back, out of the Pokemon center and into the city and above. The sun's rays are turning orange as it heads slowly downwards. We see Green cheerfully heading to the Gym, Blue locking the doors to the Miracle Cycle bike shop, Fire storming off after arguing with the guard in front of the cave by the river. Many people met each other, many stories of life crossed each other and changed. This is Cerulean City. A Mysterious Blue Aura Surrounds It...


	15. Route 25 - No Secret Gardens Here, Stop Looking

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red encounters a strange, talking Pokemon named Bill.

The place: Route 25. It's a slightly cloudy, but nice morning. Red walks along the river, when he spots a familiar blonde ponytail. It's Yellow, hiding behind a bush, apparently stalking a child.

Red  
.................

Yellow  
...Oh! It's you again, Red.

Red  
...What.

Yellow  
What? "Are you up to," I'm assuming? Research.

Red  
....................................

Yellow  
What's with the stare? Anyway, see that kid over there, with the Slowpoke?

That Kid Over There, With The Slowpoke  
My dad took me to S.S.Anne! That party they held there was super great! Is anyone jealous? Hello?

Red  
...

Yellow  
Yeah, he's got some kind of a connection with Mew, and I'm trying to figure that out. Can you take a few pictures of him for me?

Red  
....................................................................

Yellow  
You're making a face.

Red nods.

Yellow  
Will you help me?

Red shakes his head.

Yellow  
Okay. That's fine.

Red walks away.

Pika  
(Okay, did I miss something or was that rude of him?)

Nickie  
*shrugs*

Diego  
(It's a human thing, probably. We wouldn't understand.)

Red continues his walk until he reaches the end of the cape. He looks at the sea, then at the river, vaguely confused by the idea of a road that doesn't lead to a different place, but just stops. He looks to the left and sees a little cottage, then heads for it.

Red  
*knocks*

There's no answer. Red waits. He waits, then knocks again. A muffled voice speaks from inside.

Muffled voice  
Come on in!

Red  
*goes in*

A tiny Clefairy stands in the room.

Clefairy  
Hi, I'm a Pokemon!

Red  
Mm.

Clefairy  
...Don't just accept that so easily.

Pika  
(Wow! A Pokemon that talks like a human! Are you guys seeing this? That's so neat!)

Clefairy  
I'm not a Pokemon. My name's Bill!

Red  
*nods*

Pika  
(What.)

Bill  
...You sure are completely unflappable. I can respect that. But anyway I'm kind of in a pickle here so do you mind helping?

Red  
?

Bill  
Haha that wasn't a no right? See, I'm not supposed to be a Pokemon, but I am, and I need to fix that. And I need you to help me fix that!

Red  
*nods*

Bill  
So, uh, I'm gonna go in that thing over there, and you're going to click this button on my computer when I'm in there. Okay? Not before, only when I'm in there. Otherwise... the Clefairy I swapped with would probably die. Maybe I'd die, too.

Red  
...Got it.

Nickie  
(We're sure saving Clefairys recently, huh?)

Diego  
(Hey! Bill, wait a sec! I want to test something!)

Diego gets out of his Pokeball and goes up to Bill.

Bill  
Oh, hey there, little... uh, not-so-little right now guy.

Diego  
(Can you understand what I'm saying?)

Bill  
Ha, yeah, charmander char to you too.

Diego  
(...You just said "athlete piano" so I'm guessing no?)

Bill  
Uhh char cha?

Diego  
(...Wh... Eugh?)

Nickie  
*laughs* (Holy shit did he really say that?!)

Daniel  
*sighs*

Pika  
(Same.)

Diego returns to his Pokeball.

Bill  
...I might've offended your Charmander. Sorry about that.

Red  
... *narrows eyes*

Bill  
...I'm very sorry.

Red  
*nods*

Bill  
So, anyway, I'm going in now! Remember to click the button when I'm inside!

So Bill goes in and Red clicks the button, and the machine does the thing. A man steps out of the door Bill didn't go in.

Bill the human  
Ta-da! It's me, Bill, and BOY am I glad to be me again!

Pika  
(...I don't understand what happened.)

Diego  
(What? Why wouldn't you? I mean he explained what's going on?)

Nickie  
(Yeah, he turned from a human into a Pokemon, and then turned back.)

Pika  
(Impossible. It must've been a trick of some sort... He's a ventriloquist or something! Him and that weird Clefairy were both pranking us!)

Rowina  
(No, I... don't think that's it.)

Diego  
(What's a ventrilocust?)

Nickie  
(Folks, just drop it. I'm bored of this argument already.)

Diego  
(Daniel, what's a ventrolicost?)

Daniel  
(Huh? Uhh... Some sort of a candy? Probably?)

Diego  
(I see! Daniel, you're so smart!)

Daniel  
(Eheh...) *blush*

Gyadon  
*looks at the viewers like in The Office*

Bill  
Thank you so much, uh... Oh man, I can't believe I never asked your name. Silly me!

Red  
...

Bill  
...What's your name?

Red  
Red.

Bill  
Red! Okay! Cool name. I met a kid called Green earlier. Anyway, I gotta give you something...

Bill looks around, and picks up a Pokeball.

Bill  
You want an Eevee? Oh, wait, you've got six Pokemon already, don't you...

Eevee  
(rrrrrrrrrr)

Bill  
...Yeah, I'm not sure you woulda wanted this Eevee anyway. Well! Forget that. Uhhh...

Bill sets the Pokeball back down and scans the mess on his table.

Bill  
Oh! Here!

Bill grabs a ticket and offers it.

Bill  
This here's a ticket to a party on the S.S Anne! You know, the cruise ship? It'll set off in Vermilion City. They invited me, but what do I care about parties? All I'd do was wish I was on my computer. So you can take my place if you want!

Red  
... *takes the ticket*

Bill  
Great! Well! Have fun at the party! Uhh and you might want to start heading to Vermilion so you're not late for the ship. Not that I want to get rid of you or any- Oh, you're leaving already. Okay. Bye.

Red waves and exits.

Bill  
...I don't think he spoke more than three words.

Eevee  
(rrrrrrrr)

Bill  
Oh, shush. Geez, what am I gonna do with you...

We leave Bill to his worries and follow after Red, exiting the cottage. As Red begins to retrace his steps back to Cerulean City, the riverside road stretches out ahead of us. Someone's challenged that boy we saw earlier into a battle. Behind a tree, Yellow watches it all, making notes. Her right hand phases out of existence and her skin turns purple, but only for a second. She picks up the pen that dropped out of her nonexistant hand with routine-like ease. This is Route 25. The road to Bill's garden.


End file.
